SonofTerra Posted January 5, 2011 Share Posted January 5, 2011 Now that i have more time I figured i would re-start with my DIY chapter with some slightly new approaches. Starting of course with the Origins :D Index Astartes: Disciples of the Jackal Origins In the years leading to the dawn of the 32nd millennium, Imperial sectors located deep within the galaxies Cygnus Arm began to see increased attacks upon their cities. Imperial guard regiments, already dwindling under constant war with the Ork Hordes inhabiting Szakal V, were now facing an increasing amount of raids from Eldar of unknown origin. While initially these raids were focused upon outlying regions, they slowly began to be more bold and daring, striking upon worlds with heavier defenses and enslaving more and more humans. Along with the need for more chapters of Astartes in many other areas of the galaxy, the High Lords of Terra commissioned the 3rd founding. Amongst the newly formed was Chapter 55, bearing the geneseed of the fifth Primarch, Jaghatai Khan. The Chapter was made to clear the threats in the Szakal subsector of the Cygnus Arm. The geneseed of the Khan was used as the High Lords knew of both the White Scars deep hatred for the Eldar as well as their history of fighting the Orks. Original command of Chapter 55 was given to 5th Captain Lorenz Oken of the Storm Lords. Lorenz Oken was chosen based not only on his fierceness as a warrior, but also on his mental acuity. Being granted the honor of choosing the new chapters name, Oken recalled a tale told to him while he was a scout with the Storm Lords. It told of the discovery of the Szakal System and how when ancient scientist first viewed images of it, it appeared that a small golden star was eating a much larger and brighter star. Szakal Zlocisty was the name gifted to this star, both for its golden color and its apparent ferociousness. The name meant Golden Jackal in one of Terras ancient languages, an animal which evolved from a small predator into one of Terras, and other colonized planets, most feared animals. Thus Oken decreed that the 55th Chapter was to bear the name "Disciples of the Jackal" in honor of both their destination and their mission. And now for other reference (and to keep all my ideas somewhere) a bullet point form of the remaining sections Overall Themes: -keeping in tune with many White Scar traditions / names. ie, stormseers instead of librarians, and Brotherhoods instead of companies -The number 5. The jackals are the 5th successor of the 5th primarchs original legion. May lead to me going too far into using the number... -Because of the previous point, and the visions of the Chaplains ( beliefs section) they believe they are more important than other white scars successors - As with all WS chapters they have a deep hatred for the Dark Eldar. Origins: (to be added into what is there) -Want to include a Cerberus reference somewhere... possibly working off of soddinnutters idea of an elite squad of three warriors, but perhaps they replace the master of the hunt? - Refer to chaplains as Anubi (much like the white scars refer to captains and such as Khans) - Originally supposed to be a fleet based chapter, but end up maintaining a homeworld in the Szackal system. - Homeworld: - Feral world, located in the cygnus arm, due galactic north of Justice rock, according to this map from the DIY guide http://www.joachim-adomeit.de/wh40k/spacemap/map.html -Climate and size of modern day earth. - 5 moons (4 moons serve as a home for different brotherhoods, 1 is a small mechanicus forgeworld) -Chosen in part because of its populations similarities to mundus planus - Has not developed more due to creatures that prey on the humans Beliefs: - View the emperor as the pinnacle of man, but not as a god. - That Jaghatai Khan is being held prisoner by the Dark Eldar - All of the chaplains in the chapter simultaneously suffer from visions on a few occasions. These visions lead them to taking a homeworld, finding a webway portal (perhaps Jaghatai, who they believe the visions to be from, found information on this before he was captured) - All marines from their homeworld bear many tattoos instead of ritual facial scars - Partake in many blood drinking rituals when fighting the dark eldar, hoping that the "blood-learning" from their omophagea will show them information on their primarch Organization / Combat Doctrine: -Start off with 10 Brotherhoods, and are for all intents and purposes a "codex chapter" -Chapter slowly starts to deviate after the first homeworld born marine is promoted to chapter master, who gives each brotherhood a name in honor of different beliefs/tribes from their homeworld. -5 Main Brotherhoods, and 5 lower brotherhoods are the result of this in time. The main brotherhoods consist of 125 battle brothers, while the lesser brotherhoods contain 75 each. When marines from the Major brotherhoods die, an astartes from any of the lower brotherhoods who excels at their particular style of combat is promoted. -the lesser Brotherhoods contain the new scouts, as well as tactical marines, but do not differ greatly from each other. -The 5 major Brotherhoods vary greatly from each other, although each has a sufficient number of tactical marines. - Brotherhood of the Water Drake: Contains Brothers who are deemed destined to become Stormseers, Chaplains, Apothecaries, Techmarines or who show exceptional leadership, as well as those already in the aforementioned positions. Most similar tactics to the Codex. - Brotherhood of the Phoenix: For those who seem to never die, which has led to a higher use of bionics than others . Specialize in defending strategic positions and using flame and melta weaponry. - Brotherhood of the Yeti: Originally forged of the 9th and 10th companies, the Yeti contains a high number of veteran scout squads and devastators. Favored tactic is for the scouts to locate important positions for the devastators to unleash on in surprise. - Brotherhood of the Basilisk: Contains a greater number of Terminators and heavy tanks. - Brotherhood ??????????: assault based. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NightrawenII Posted January 5, 2011 Share Posted January 5, 2011 Hm, I can't say I'm impressed with the meaning of the name. I could understand to be named because of the cunning or viciousness, but because of the scavenger status? Really? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
soddinnutter Posted January 5, 2011 Share Posted January 5, 2011 Scavenger =/= Astartes Apex level predator = Astartes As NightrawenII said. Because of innate cunning, malice and viciousness. You could even have them feasting on the flesh of a fallen commander and his elite troops after a particularly good hunt if you want to take the 'Jaghatai Khan's lads going for a hunt' thing to its far extreme. Even have them replacing their teeth with fangs and a second voluntary veteran scout company for the full feral effect. but naming your selves after something that picks at the discarded bones of a better predators hunt? That is not associated with the legacy of the White Scars. Raven Guard on a bad day maybe, but not a son of Khan. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SonofTerra Posted January 5, 2011 Author Share Posted January 5, 2011 Both very valid points. Which i totally agree with. I will re-write the intro there later on tonight (gotta head to class now) twisting it to show cunning and/or viciousness instead. Another name could be used as well, However, i am a little pigeon holed as i am doing this for my current modeled army which uses lots of space wolf imagery, so the name would have to include some sort of canine, and obviously i do not want to use Wolves as i have no intent on them being a space wolf descendant. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SonofTerra Posted January 6, 2011 Author Share Posted January 6, 2011 So after doing a bunch of research today (which i should have done earlier) on jackals and other species of similar origins i have found a few options to go with. Black-backed Jackal- smaller than the golden jackal, but more daring. Will hunt animals up to 3 times its size, but have been recorded to take tries at rhiniceri (rhinocerouses?) The Golden Jackal- the largest of the Jackal sub species. Will eat anything, but is most adept at hunting small, quick animals such as hares. more related to grey wolves than it is to other jackals. Portrayed in Indian mythology as a trickster and in egyptian as.... Anubis- Egyptian god of the dead. Could be a viable way to go incorporating the protection of the dead and of rebirth (he was colored black to symbolize this, not death necessarily). Also considered "keeper of the divine justice", and a lord of the underworld Cerberus- The 3 (or 2 or 1 or up to 50 depending on source)-headed dog guarding hades. Thought to be based on a Golden Jackal. The three heads represent the past, present and future. The three heads would only eat meat ( and not the souls of the dead ) which could play into soddinnutters idea about taking the hunt to an extreme. So these are 4 possible routes to go, so to add onto that i will very briefly go over some of my other ideas to sort of show where i would like to go with this - 3rd founding b/c i want to play around with the number 5 ( with them being the 5th chapter of the 5th legion, following the marauders, storm lords, rampagers and destroyers) - Also i want the chapter to have very slowly deviated from being codex, starting with when the first marine from their homeworld is elevated to chapter master -important feature i want to add is a central "character" who receives a vision from who he thinks is the primarch, it shows them important places/things like dark eldar webways exits, resulting in them believing that besides the white scars themselves, they are the primarchs favored and that he will emerge from the webway in their domain. However, something in the vision is horrific, and the "character" does not reveal it to anyone except his chosen successor who learns of it through drinking his blood (contained somewhere safe so that the knowledge is not lost). So, thoughts/suggestions? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Telveryon Posted January 6, 2011 Share Posted January 6, 2011 - 3rd founding b/c i want to play around with the number 5 ( with them being the 5th chapter of the 5th legion, following the marauders, storm lords, rampagers and destroyers) Umm... I think you are referring here to the second Founding, when the Legions slip into chapters. The problem is that Founding is off limits to all but the Ultramarines, and even that is a bit dodgy... -important feature i want to add is a central "character" who receives a vision from who he thinks is the primarch, it shows them important places/things like dark eldar webways exits, resulting in them believing that besides the white scars themselves, they are the primarchs favored and that he will emerge from the webway in their domain. However, something in the vision is horrific, and the "character" does not reveal it to anyone except his chosen successor who learns of it through drinking his blood (contained somewhere safe so that the knowledge is not lost). While visions are legitimate way of motivating beliefs in the Warhammer universe, they are a bit easy to pull off and using them usually makes your chapter very character centric which is hard to pull off well. Also, a vision showing them things as specific as the dark eldar side of the webway is a bit too precise and convenient. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NightrawenII Posted January 6, 2011 Share Posted January 6, 2011 - 3rd founding b/c i want to play around with the number 5 ( with them being the 5th chapter of the 5th legion, following the marauders, storm lords, rampagers and destroyers) 5th successor of the White Scars, there are already 5 Chapters of 5th Legion. :) -important feature i want to add is a central "character" who receives a vision from who he thinks is the primarch, it shows them important places/things like dark eldar webways exits, resulting in them believing that besides the white scars themselves, they are the primarchs favored and that he will emerge from the webway in their domain. However, something in the vision is horrific, and the "character" does not reveal it to anyone except his chosen successor who learns of it through drinking his blood (contained somewhere safe so that the knowledge is not lost). This make your Chapter more character-cenric than Chapter-centric. It's not bad when pulled right, but it ussually dissolves the character of the Chapter as a whole. Also how could they know that this is not some kind of trickery of Chaos-Gods? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
soddinnutter Posted January 6, 2011 Share Posted January 6, 2011 Jaghatai Khan is rumored to be a prisoner in the Dark City so maybe they believe that it is he who is sending the visions. you could use an amalgamation of all 4 jackal-types. And after 30,000+ years in genetic isolation there are probably new breeds of jackal around anyway. Would not directly state things like Cerberus Squads having three members who hunt down specific adversaries of the Chapter and eat their hearts because in the year 40,000 it is less then likely that your chapter will encounter anyone who knows the name Cerberus and relates it to a deformed dog. Have elite Hunter Squads of three members who, the neophytes are encouraged to believe, live of nothing but the meat of their victims. The Anubis theme is pretty easy to do. Just give a Chaplain modified helmet (elongate the snout). They are already for the chapter 'Keepers of the Underworld' in a spiritual sense and their job description may easily be extended to include dispensing judgement on in-chapter arguments. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SonofTerra Posted January 6, 2011 Author Share Posted January 6, 2011 Thanks for the quick input guys. @Telveryon. What i meant to say is that they would be the 5th successor to the white scars (as nightrawen pointed out), so during the 2nd founding the Storm Lords, Marauders, Rampagers and Destroyers were created, then During the third, these guys would be the first official White scars successor of the group, making them the 5th :D - to elaborate on what i was thinking for the visions/character Like soddinnutter said, Khan is rumored to be a captive of the dark eldar, and the thought is that the character thinks it is Khan who is sending this message, He gives a bit of infomation, like the whereabouts of a couplewebways gates, maybe one big one like the one described in a Thousand Sons, but also reveals something that is horrific or devastating to the chapter about the future that the character will not reveal. I would use this as my one piece of the unknown, because what could be so bad that the original character, and all his successors choose to have their vocal chords removed so that they cant speak of this? I'm not sure, but i think it adds a little mystery, and maybe even opens the door for some speculation like nightrawens "How do they know its not a trick of the chaos gods?". It could even be a series of visions, with the first couple showing "good" things for the chapter, and the third being the one that is "bad". For the character, i dont want him to overtake the chapter in any means, he has a vision or two, which helps mould the chapters belief that it is favored by the primarch, but other than whats been talked about already, his biggest impact would be choosing/suggesting the exact homeworld for the chapter (from the vision?) or maybe being the first to drink the blood of the commanders of the enemy, to see if it contains any information on Khans whereabouts. One connection i like is that as Cerberus guarded the door to the underworld, the jackals could view the Webway as such a door, and have a unit dedicated to guarding over the one big webway portal that was shown in the vision. Believing this to be the one that the Primarch will emerge from, they build either a fortress there, or even use it as their homeworld. Once again thanks, and keep it coming :P Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NightrawenII Posted January 7, 2011 Share Posted January 7, 2011 Like soddinnutter said, Khan is rumored to be a captive of the dark eldar, and the thought is that the character thinks it is Khan who is sending this message. He gives a bit of infomation, like the whereabouts of a couple webways gates, maybe one big one like the one described in a Thousand Sons, but also reveals something that is horrific or devastating to the chapter about the future that the character will not reveal. - The problem with this is that if the Khan *is* held as captive in Dark City. How could he know about whereabouts of these Webway gates? - Second if the Character is the only one, who receives the visions. The rest of Chapter will give him funny looks and sent him into Librarium to get *special* treatment. This is universe full of vile daemons, tricksters and sorcerers. The marines aren't *that* naïve. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
soddinnutter Posted January 7, 2011 Share Posted January 7, 2011 What NightrawenII said. Have it so that every so often all the Chaplains get a simultaneous dream. there is no deamonic or Chaotic disturbance detected by the librarians or resident Astropaths. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SonofTerra Posted January 20, 2011 Author Share Posted January 20, 2011 Edited the origins (hopefully on a better track) and added some rough ideas on where I'm heading for the other sections. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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