Shasosyro Posted January 12, 2011 Share Posted January 12, 2011 Well, here I am, throwing some meat for you sharks to tear apart. I realize that my origins and history section is far too long (it's not even done yet), and that the Homeworld, Combat Doctrine, Organization, Beliefs and Geneseed (though I've touched on some of these in what I already have) sections still must be added, but I just feel like posting this up here so I can get some feedback on what you guys think is stupid/unrealistic (undoubtably there will be something!) and what you think is interesting. Thanks in advance for ripping me and my work to gory shreds (for my own benefit of course!) Shas'O'Syro Origins: When was your Chapter formed? Split from the Blood Drinkers in 120 M.40, formed from the 4th and 9th companies, as well as elements of the 1st, 6th, and 7th. Why was your Chapter created? Disgust and concern with the path of the Blood Drinkers Chapter, and a botched confrontation with the Chapter's leadership leads to a penitent crusade being undertaken, led by Captain Samnos Dyracusia (9th) and Petro Mantova (4th). The Blood Drinkers were formed during the Second Founding just following the Horus Heresy. One of the six chapters formed from the remains of the 9th Legion, they immediately set out into the expanses of the Segmentum Tempestus, inspired by the holy visions of their leader: Julius Vladarius, former Reclusiarch of the Blood Angels Legion. Following 94 years of epic journey and righteous battle, the fleet came upon the Helios System of the Draco Sector. The region had been relatively unscathed by the ravages of the Heresy, and provided a strong location from which to base a Space Marine chapter. The world chosen by Vladarius and his Chapter was populated, just barely, by tribal humans. The death world, named San Guisaga, was also home to ancient xenotech and dark artifacts. These had been discovered by the Elabus Tribe (one of four major groups of humans that had survived the deserts, fauna, and plagues of their tumultuous history). The Elabus had been changed, warped, and corrupted into beasts with an insatiable thirst for human flesh and blood. The other clans lived and died in terror of the Elabus warriors for long years until the arrival of the Blood Drinkers. Almost immediately, Vladarius would lead an expedition to the dark island bastions of the Elabus and into the deep vaults beneath the surface of the world. The battles beneath those dark isles were not recorded, or the stories have not survived the following millenia, but all agree that what the Elabus found was forgotten for good reason. Only anecdotal tales of those early days remain to warn the Chapter and people of San Guisaga of the dangers in delving too deep. In the centuries following the Horus Heresy, the Chaplains and Sanguinary Priests watched in concern and dread as the dark aspects of Sanguinius' blood began to emerge more prominently in their battle brothers. The Black Rage and Red Thirst, eternal internal enemies of the Blood Angels and their successors, were identified by the Magos Biologis and Genetors attached to the chapters. They raced to cure and discover the causes for these terrible afflictions, and nearly ten thousand years later, remain unsuccessful. The Blood Drinkers were no exception to this, but instead found themselves worse beset by the Red Thirst for blood and violencethan the other Sons of Sanguinius. Over years of research and consultation with their counterparts across the galaxy, the Genetors of the Blood Drinkers realized that not only was the Chapter afflicted with the same flaws as the other Sons of Sanguinius, but they suffered from a mutated Omophagea gene. The desire to consume flesh felt by the warriors of other chapters in the heat of battle was something that the battle brothers of the Blood Drinkers fought at all times to contain. Something about the chapter's gene-seed had changed in the relatively few years since their divergence from the 9th Legion. Some of the Chapter's Librarians suggested the dark events of the planet's first scouring. They were silenced by the Vladarius and his council, for fear of uncovering knowledge and stories best left forgotten. They were Space Marines, and they would deal with their flaws in the only way possible, through resilience and stubborn-mindedness. Unlike the other Sons of Sanguinius, the Blood Drinkers remained strict and devout followers of the Codex Astartes. They would not be ruled by the curse in their blood, they would overcome it through sheer force of will. Over the following millenia, the Chapter provided glorious service in defence of the Imperium and her people. Elements of the Blood Drinkers participated in campaigns across the entire Segmentum Tempestus and impressed even other Astartes with their vicious yet disciplined fighting. Only the most astute scholar would ever find the coincidental mysterious mass disappearances amongst the populations of worlds they fought to protect. Only the most suspicious Inquisitor would ever suspect that these disappearances were anything but the natural losses of an unforgiving war-zone. Following the death of Vladarius in the Buccarat Scouring, the Chapter Masters of the Blood Drinkers began to allow the dark hungers of their gene-seed to fester within their battle brothers. The Chaplains, by now all recruits from their home world of San Guisaga, let the ancient tribal superstitions of their ancestors find a place in the Chapter's own traditions. No outsider would ever notice the slow change in the Blood Drinkers, but the aged veterans of the Great Crusade, individuals who still remembered the glory days of the 9th Legion, saw the rot. They saw as blood rights and ancient rituals of the San tribes crept into the Chapter. They would not submit to this change, this activity that would damn any regular imperial citizen in the eyes of even the most moderate of observers. These veterans remembered tales of the warrior lodges pervading many of the legions in the years before the Heresy and formed their own secret society to uphold the Astartes ideals and fight their genetically induced decay. Ironically, their secret society was formed to fight heresy rather than spread it. It was not long before disappearances were reported on San Guisaga itself. Eyewitness accounts told of giant humanoid creatures in the garb of Elabus warriors that arrived in the night to spirit away children and drain them dry of blood, leaving only desiccated husks. Others spoke of ravening beasts that consumed their victims alive. Often, a man would leave his village to hunt and never return. Upon investigation, a campsite would be found, but with no trace of the tracker to be glimpsed. As the martial successes of the Blood Drinkers built up, so too did the list of incidents on their home world. The Space Marines themselves even aided the tribesmen in searches for the culprits. None were ever found. Throughout the millenia, the glories and memories of the distant past and the Great Crusade slowly faded. Yet the echoes were preserved by the Secret Order of the Wardens Sanguine, who while accepting that the genetics of their blood were irreparably tainted by the Sanguinius' death and the forgotten events beneath the Elabus Isles, refused to let the spiritual purity of Sanguinius' legacy be dishonoured by bloody debauchery and urgings of the flesh. Throughout their long history, the most numerous participants in the order were battle brothers of the Devastator Marines. Members of the Order came from all sections of the Blood Drinkers, but the majority of their leadership came from the Sanguinary Priesthood and the Librarium. The calmest, most logical, and most honourable brothers of the Chapter met as part of this order. Sadly for the people of San Guisaga and the worlds liberated and saved by the Chapter though, this organization never became large or influential enough to turn the Blood Drinkers from their namesake activity. In the first decades of the 40th Millennium, events led the Wardens Sanguine to believe that clandestine resistance was no longer sufficient to slow the Chapter's long and dangerous decline. The Librarians of the Order, while concerned for the future of the souls of their brothers, still could not believe the chapter had not long ago fallen into the worship of the Chaos God Khorne. The only explanation? Relics uncovered in secret excavations of the workings beneath the ancient xenos ruins upon the Elabus Isles. While their true purpose remained unknown, the auras and null fields of the artifacts suggested that the same events and technology that had activated the mutation of the Chapter's Omophagea may have been responsible for the Chapter's seeming avoidance of the eye of Chaos. Whatever the causes, fallout from the Chapter's practices was catching up with the Blood Drinkers. In 067000 M.41, an Ordo Hereticus investigation of the Chapter was opened, and the disappearance reports collated and analyzed. In 091000 M.41, when the Blood Drinkers broke the Siege of Mundus Callisto, the retreating traitor hordes were slaughtered in the thousands by battle brothers consumed by the Red Thirst. Their corpses were then torn apart and consumed, flesh, bone, and all, by the insane Astartes. It was hours before the Space Marines returned to their senses and were gathered up and extracted by the 9th Company - led by newly-minted Captain Samnos Dyracusia – who's Devastator Marines had reluctantly remained in their distant support role as the carnage had unfolded. The local loyal imperial citizens who had witnessed the massacre were soon located as well. They faced the same fate as the traitors. Some witnesses escaped the purging by their so-called protectors, and word soon reached the Ordo Hereticus. Suspicions were mounting in the Ordos Draconian on Isis, capital of the sector, that the Chapter was straying far from the Emperor's light. It was soon after this debacle and other such incidents that the leadership of the Order of the Wardens Sanguine decided to directly confront Chapter Master Zoltan and his cadre of advisors, including the most respected an experienced veterans of the Blood Drinkers. The meeting went poorly, with the tempers of both parties flaring up as then were wont to do in uncomfortable situations. Dyracusia, moderately calmer than his fellow Order-Master – Petro Mantova of the 4th Company – attempted to convince the Chapter Master of the Danger in the path the Chapter was treading. The confrontation was to little avail. It did though get the Blood Drinkers' command to pay heed to the danger of Inquisitorial suspicion. Dyracusia, Mantova, and their companies (who by and large sympathized with the sentiments of their leaders) were sent on a thinly veiled penitent crusade for their “disregard and contempt” for the great history of the Chapter's traditions and heroes. Ironically, prior to leaving, they were warned to keep a tight grip on their forces and ensure that disappearances amongst the local populaces of visited world were kept to a minimum. Tactical squads from the 6th and 7th Companies, as well as Terminator armoured veterans from the 1st were sent along to watch the two suspended Captains and aid in this show of purity and loyalty to the Imperium for the benefit of the Ordo Hereticus. The Expedition never returned to San Guisaga. Also, some stuff I can already see may need better explanation and/or fixing: The xenos artifacts under the surface of San Guisaga and their effects (either describing more or less, maybe changing them? maybe some better reasoning for why the chapter has not fallen to khorne worship?) Also, the reaction of the chapter's leadership to the confrontation with the Order of the Wardens Sanguine (some changes? too radical? not radical enough?) How about the events leading up to and causing the Order to confront the Chapter Master? Maybe not serious enough to warrant the confrontation? Maybe they would have done it earlier? Also: Important!: This long description is about the Blood Drinkers, but I feel is needed for understanding of my Chapter: The Blood Wardens. As you may see from where I left off, the Blood Wardens (or Wardens Sanguine) part is coming up next. Note: While this idea and story originally formed in my skull some months ago without inspiration (well other than from GW obviously), upon some research I discovered some existing fan-made fluff on the Blood Drinkers Chapter, and I incorporated this into my story, while trying not to completely mutilate the work of it's creator (I think I failed, as my idea for the basic beliefs and behaviour of the Blood Drinkers obviously don't mesh with his). Here is his blog anyway, so no one can claim that I'm stealing ideas without due credit: :) http://theveilsedge.blogspot.com/ Edited for: A bunch of errors in spelling, grammar, formatting, and adding some notes and annotations for the purposes of clarifying where I want to go with this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Shiny One Posted January 12, 2011 Share Posted January 12, 2011 As you mentioned yourself, its long and focuses mainly on the Blood Drinkers but good written and easy to read. If you want to convert it into an IA, i think it would be better to just summarize it and focus on the Blood Wardens. I think its kind of canon that the Blood Drinkers eat there enemies and why and where is not really relevant for your splinter group. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Juan Juarez Posted January 12, 2011 Share Posted January 12, 2011 So they split from the Blood Drinkers.. When was this decision ratified by the High Lords of Terra to allow them to remain a Chapter, rather than be purged as traitors? The only division of a Chapter that I am aware of is the three Companies of Iron Hands who became the Sons of Medusa, differing on points of - basically - theology. Suddenly having Companies and Company elements go "Well, we're all for the slaying and the drinking of blood.. But eating people is just so last year..." seems a bit.. *searchs for a similie for /faceplam* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Shiny One Posted January 12, 2011 Share Posted January 12, 2011 As i understand it they will become renegades over time, so the split is not a decision of the high Lords. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Juan Juarez Posted January 12, 2011 Share Posted January 12, 2011 As i understand it they will become renegades over time, so the split is not a decision of the high Lords. Whether they go renegade over time isn't the point; as soon as they break from their parent Chapter they are traitors unless the HLoT ratify that descision and give them leave to become a new Chapter. If the ratification is not given, then they are fair game for any Imperial Force to put down. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leonaides Posted January 12, 2011 Share Posted January 12, 2011 And a penitent crusade of over 1/4 of the chapter is a big thing... Especially a crusade that big from an 'official' chapter. I'd also be carfelu about suggesting that the original BA marines didnt do their jobs in training the new recruits well enough. Or assuming that there were any left by the time these tribal superstitions started to become prevalent. If it really was that soon, then the original BA's were totally negligent in their training. You're looking at rituals and doctrine being changed within a few hundred years - under the very noses of the trainers. Try and track down a copy of 'Space Marine' if you can - you'll find a few conversations with a Blood Drinker lieutenant (sergeant or similar rank now I guess) that will help you with a lot of your back-story regarding the Blood Drinkers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shasosyro Posted January 12, 2011 Author Share Posted January 12, 2011 Thank you so much for your replies guys. First of all, Juan Juarez, thanks for the imput, and you are correct. I think as soon as the crusade fleet failed to return and/or refused to reply to communication from the chapter they would normally be declared renegade. While I have not yet posted details on the history of the splinter group, my idea is that they would continue fighting for the Emperor in the usual manner. My thought was that the parent chapter would, given the Inquisitorial Scrutiny, attempt to keep the defection of their brothers under wraps to prevent a full enquiry into the loyalty of the entire chapter (ordos hereticus has done more for less provocation!). Do you think that this would be possible, is it more likely that the chapter would seek inquisitorial aid to track down the renegades? As for the reasoning of the defection, I guess I may not have explained what I'm envisioning as well as possible. The Order of the Wardens Sanguine is opposed to allowing any of the genetic curses of Sanguinius - not just the flesh eating and blood lust caused by the mutated Omophagea gene, but the Red Thirst as well - control their actions. Obviously, its members are no less affected by the Black Rage, as its onset is not at all in control of its victims. The Red Thirst, the Order believes, can be fought though. The most imprtant belief of the order, I think, is that their role as the Emperor's Space Marines means that they exist to defend the people of the Imperium. Eating them and/or drinking their blood is unacceptable. They feel that giving into their disorder is as great a betrayal of the Imperium as any heresy. Leonaides, I see what you mean, I guess that the veterans from the Great Crusade and Heresy would be influential and respected enough to prevent backwards practices from creeping into the Chapter. The reason I had the few remaining veterans quietly oppose the change (yet unable to prevent it) was to actually have someone to create the Order in the first place. How should I go about getting around this? Again, thanks for the input everyone! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shasosyro Posted January 13, 2011 Author Share Posted January 13, 2011 Beliefs of the Order and the Chapter The Blood Wardens define themselves by their considerable differences from their former brethren of the Blood Drinkers Chapter. While sharing the same damaged geneseed and curse of insatiable blood lust, the Blood Wardens constantly fight their own natures and seek to overcome their hungers for flesh and blood. By Imperial standards, they are humanitarians, their loyalty is not to the Imperium as the baroque machine it is, but instead the human race as a whole, especially Imperial citizens. The idealists that formed the original Secret Order of the Wardens Sanguine felt that the Machiavellian “If the end justifies the means” attitude taken by the leaders of humanity was slowly damning the souls of the entire race. Saving a planet from xenos occupation was despicable if it required the destruction of the citizens they fought. Far worse though in their opinions though was the wanton killings and blood rituals of their brothers as the mutated Omophagea gene of the Blood Drinkers slowly took over the Chapter's culture and addiction to bloodletting crept into the hearts of the Astartes. The Secret Order of the Wardens Sanguine had its foundations in the last years of the veterans of the Great Crusade. It was nearly a Millennium following the Chapter's arrival upon San Guisaga when the Chapter's Librarium and Sanguinary Priesthood formed the Order as a method for the protection and remembrance of the glorious history of not only the Chapter, but of the 9th Legion before it, and the days of Sanguinius' and his inspired leadership. Most important to the well-learned founders of the Order was Sanguinius' love for all people, no matter their position in the Emperor's plan, and his willingness to make sacrifices for the protection of all Imperial citizens. Now this is not to say that the Blood Wardens or their predecessors are, or ever were, “Friendly Marines.” They have always realized that not every human can be saved from the innumerable predators waiting in the dark to prey upon the vulnerable peoples of the Imperium. When any possibility exists of protecting the Emperor's citizens though, the Blood Wardens will take it, even if retreating to fight at a stronger position would be more prudent. Maybe this explains the beliefs of the Blood Wardens and the Order a little more coherently. The most pressing and difficult problem for me to overcome before I can continue with the writing of their history since their split from the Blood Drinkers is as Juan Juarez pointed out (or I deduced from his posting), what action would the Blood Drinkers take after the departure of the Crusade Fleet? Would they just let the 4th and 9th companies go do their thing, and the Order and their forces (the 4th and 9th companies) decide to split off due to some event during their seperation from the parent chapter? If this was the case, would the Blood Drinkers, when the Crusading Fleet did not return or contact them, go after them alone to keep the betrayal quiet, or would they put out the information? AlLTERNATIVELY, would the Blood Drinkers take the risk of declaring them renegade (falsly at this point), and enlisting aid from the Inquisition to eliminate them before Dyracusia and Mantova (and their 2 companies) decided to split from the Chapter anyway? Is the difference in ideology I've discribed even sufficient to warrant the events I'm suggesting? Note: I have not yet made the suggested changes to the Origins section as I want to hear how you guys suggest I make the changes you proposed in my last post. Sorry about the double post, but I want to keep working on this, and frankly keep it on the first page so I can get some suggestions. Thanks again for the feedback! Shas'O'Syro Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bix Posted March 28, 2011 Share Posted March 28, 2011 Shas'O'Syro I've just stumbled on your work, good stuff, I haven't been over to B&C for ages (poor drills I know) as I've been very busy with my blog. I thank you kindly for the nod to my Blood Drinkers fluff, much appreciated even if you have now cast the shadow of heresy in my direction ;) Theres some more 'Drinker fluff up on the blog now if you're interested, I've tried to address the mutated Omophagea and it's consequences. I'll be pressing on with the Flaw and how the 'Blood Hunger' helps, at present anyway, to control it in my next installment of the Fandex. If I can be of any help let me know. Bix Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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