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Deathwatch: The Series!


Leethal

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I have to say i don't normally like anything like this, but i laughed all the way through reading it! Great work Leethal!! Looking forward to reading more!

 

Pio Furnac: Damn straight, don't **** with me!

 

Howzer Stern: Did you just turn black?

 

Pio Furnac: What son?! You gonna do somethin' bout it?

LOL love it.

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Deathwatch: The Series!

Every Hour, on the Hour!

 

Written by Leethal of B&C

 

Thought of the Day: “Sanguinus! What’s Horus’s power level?!” “OVER NINE THOUSAAAAAAAAAAAND!” “WHAT NINE THOUSAND?!”

 

Raka Thunderhoof: Prepare for a combat drop!

Raziel: Why? What’s wrong with chillin’?

Raka Thunderhoof: The Tau are annoying the Imperium!

Howzer Stern: What’s a Tau?

Hurin Bloodfang: Blue xenofish with ridiculous looking vechiles and weapons. Oh and when you cut them, they bleed blue.

Howzer Stern: Really? Blue, huh?

Hurin Bloodfang: Serious. No joking.

Howzer Stern: But, THAT’S RIDICULOUS!

Raka Thunderhoof: Exactly. These Tau have subjugated too many of the Emperor’s loyal followers. The main source of the immediate fall of these followers lies in the Guardsmen. They have forsaken their oaths to the Emperor and accepted a Xenos force as their savior. At the head of these traitorous scum is General Chambers, also know as the Arch-Fiend. Our job is to capture him and kill as many traitors and xenogeny as possible. Our secondary objective is to kill this Tau commander.

Raises two pictures

Raziel: All Tau look alike though.

Raka Thunderhoof: Exactly. That’s why we will just kill every xenogeny scum you see! The Emperor knows who is who, SOMEHOW. Now most of the armed opposition will be the Fire Caste. The Warriors of the Tau Race, also known as Fire Warriors. Yes Iruel?

Iruel: How are we getting there?

Raka Thunderhoof: Undercover insertion. Five miles from the main encampment. We will be extracted by Thunderhawk.

Howzer Stern: Collateral damage?

Raka Thunderhoof: The Emperor will know his own. What Julius?

Julius Raseac: The Codex Astartes states to win the hearts and minds of the-

Raka Thunderhoof: Ferrus?

Ferrus Pollux: Aye. Smacks Julius

Raka Thunderhoof: Good job. Board the Droppod boys!

 

~~~~Droppods are raining down on my hea-*SQUISH*~~~~

 

Raziel: It’s raining dropods on my head, it doesn’t matter-

Iruel: Stop. Seriously.

Raziel: Quiet pretty boy.

Skarr Blackfeather: I can’t see why I can’t get a Jumppack.

Iruel: Me too! I want one too!

Raka Thunderhoof: SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP!

Ferrus Pollux: Umm….Sir?

Raka Thunderhoof: WHAT?!

Ferrus Pollux: Is there supposed to be a giant yellow battle suit flying next to us?

Raka Thunderhoof: No….why?

Ferrus Pollux: Oh, because there’s one flying next to us.

Raka Thunderhoof: WHAT?!!??!

 

Ka-BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM

 

Raziel: Upon fiery pinions the Dark Angel descends!

Hurin Bloodfang: I’m not meant to fly!! AAAAH!

Iruel: JUMP PACKS!!!!

Julius Raseac: The Codex Astartes states-

Raka Thunderhoof: POLLUX!

Ferrus Pollux: ON IT!

Smacks Julius upside the head

Julius Raseac: Ow! That hurt!

Raka Thunderhoof: BRACE YOURSELVES!!!

 

CRASH! ZOMFG! CLIFF HANGER! Not really. But…BOOM!

 

Raka Thunderhoof: Alright boys! Assuming you are all not dead, we have a tactical advantage! The xenos think we’re dead! Out of the dro…ppod…Damn.

Iruel: Wow, that’s a lot of xenos.

Julius Raseac: The Codex states-

Hurin Bloodfang: CHARGE!

Pio Furnac: BURN ! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Howzer Stern: Librarian! Use your powers!

Raka Thunderhoof: I only have Piercing Glare!

Howzer Stern: WHAT?! HOW ARE YOU A LIBRARIAN!?

Raka Thunderhoof: SHUTUP! KILL THE TAU!

 

~~~Gigantic barrage of pulse fire~~

 

Raka Thunderhoof: BACK IN THE DROPPOD! Damn Str 5 hurts!

Raziel: I’ll say! Why did we follow the two most insane members of the kill team and charge?

Pio Furnac: Racist.

Raziel: What?

Pio Furnac: You hear me, you nazi.

Raziel: WHAT?!?!

Raka Thunderhoof: Shut up, both of you.

Ferrus Pollux: How can a Librarian only have stupid power like that?! Can’t every White Scar Marine stare like that? Seriously!

Raka Thunderhoof: I can only cast that and Burning Man.

Pio Furnac: Sounds kinky. What’s Burning Man?

Raka Thunderhoof: I become covered in fire.

Pio Furnac: AWESOME!

Iruel: Can you shoot fire?

Raka Thunderhoof: No.

Raziel: Can you light people on fire?

Raka Thunderhoof: No.

Ferrus Pollux: What can you do?

Raka Thunderhoof: Become a giant human torch.

Howzer Stern: That’s lame.

Pio Furnac: WHAT?! THAT’S FRIGGIN AWESOME!

Hurin Bloodfang: In case you guys haven’t noticed or cared, where’s Skarr?

Julius Raseac: The Codex states-

Raka Thunderhoof: Shut up. Julius look outside.

Julius Raseac: WHAT?! Why me?

Raka Thunderhoof: Multiple reasons. If you die, you do not hurt the moral of the team, nor fighting efficiency. And you annoy me.

Julius Raseac: But I’m an Ultramarine! We do great deeds on the field of battle! Not look around!

Raziel: Exactly! This mission calls for ultra-peek! Only you can ultra-peek! Our survival depends on you!

Julius Raseac: Oh! Why didn’t you guys just say so? Looks over the battered edge of the Droppod

Raziel: Like taking candy from a baby.

Ferrus Pollux: A retarded baby.

Hurin Bloodfang: With no arms.

Howzer Stern: Or eyes.

Raka Thunderhoof: In a coma.

Pio Furnac: ON FIRE!!!!!

Iruel: Way to kill the joke.

Pio Furnac: Too much?

Raka Thunderhoof: Yes.

Julius Raseac: Hey guys?

Raziel: Aren’t you dead yet?

Julius Raseac: No, but Skar’’s outside.

Raka Thunderhoof: Is his body mangled up beyond all reasonable doubt and dead?

Julius Raseac: No, but the Tau are like that.

Iruel: Wait, what did you say?

Raziel: ….Uhh… Looks over the edge

Raziel: SERIOUSLY! What the frag!?

Everyone looks out

Skarr Blackfeather: Oh hai guys! Dis is mah power pose! Takes a katana out of a Broadside

Raka Thunderhoof: Did he just…

Ferrus Pollux: Kill all the Tau?

Raziel: SERIOUSLY, WHAT THE FRAG?!

Skarr Blackfeather: What? I just told them it was for the greater good, and they let me kill them.

The sound of eight jaws hitting the ground is heard

 

What will happen on their mission!? Find out next time!

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Raziel: Like taking candy from a baby.

Ferrus Pollux: A retarded baby.

Hurin Bloodfang: With no arms.

Howzer Stern: Or eyes.

Raka Thunderhoof: In a coma.

Pio Furnac: ON FIRE!!!!!

Iruel: Way to kill the joke.

Pio Furnac: Too much?

Raka Thunderhoof: Yes.

 

XD

I JUST LAUGHED MY ASS OFF! ;D

 

I WANT MORE! MORE!!! MGWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

 

sorry.. got carried away abit >_>

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I am Raka Thunderhoof, formerly of the White Scars Chapter! I will be your commanding officer as well as your Librarian during your service with the Deathwatch!

 

Space Wolf: Witchery!

 

Raka: Piercing Glare

 

I see what you did there.

 

Subscribed. :lol:

 

Heh...I saw that too!

 

Yes...I sense the taint of Lastie and P*R*I*M*A*R*C*H*S in this! :lol: ;)

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What? I just told them it was for the greater good, and they let me kill them.

 

Permission to sig Leethal?

 

Go ahead Capt. feel free to quote. That goes for anyone as well.

 

Thinking about having updates Monday and Friday...or whenever actually. Hmm...Episode 4 might show up soon. Maybe EVEN TODAY! :) or tomorrow, or whenever I get to add the finishing touches.

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[Arch-Fiend. Our job is to capture him and kill as many traitors and xenogeny as possible. Our secondary objective is to kill this Tau commander.[/color]

Raises two pictures

Raziel: All Tau look alike though.

Raka Thunderhoof: Exactly. That’s why we will just kill every xenogeny scum you see!

 

 

 

 

Raka Thunderhoof: Alright boys! Assuming you are all not dead, we have a tactical advantage! The xenos think we’re dead!

 

 

brilliant update yet again leethal. second quote just has to be sigged. :lol:

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Julius Raseac: But I’m an Ultramarine! We do great deeds on the field of battle! Not look around!

Raziel: Exactly! This mission calls for ultra-peek! Only you can ultra-peek! Our survival depends on you!

Julius Raseac: Oh! Why didn’t you guys just say so? Looks over the battered edge of the Droppod

I laughed so much reading that - ultra-peek! HAHAHA

 

Raziel: Like taking candy from a baby.

Ferrus Pollux: A retarded baby.

Hurin Bloodfang: With no arms.

Howzer Stern: Or eyes.

Raka Thunderhoof: In a coma.

Pio Furnac: ON FIRE!!!!!

Iruel: Way to kill the joke.

Pio Furnac: Too much?

Raka Thunderhoof: Yes.

Then i read that and actually came close to tears from laughing so much. I can just imagine a Deathwatch kill team actually sitting there saying all that, love it.

 

Leethal i love you! :)

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What? I just told them it was for the greater good, and they let me kill them.

 

 

LMAO! What a beast! Best part of the series!

 

 

 

Raziel: Like taking candy from a baby.

Ferrus Pollux: A retarded baby.

Hurin Bloodfang: With no arms.

Howzer Stern: Or eyes.

Raka Thunderhoof: In a coma.

Pio Furnac: ON FIRE!!!!!

Iruel: Way to kill the joke.

Pio Furnac: Too much?

Raka Thunderhoof: Yes.

 

I love how the salamander MUST incorporate fire into everything. :)

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What? I just told them it was for the greater good, and they let me kill them.

 

 

LMAO! What a beast! Best part of the series!

 

I think my sig shows how much I loved that line, me and Iain (he's called sword brethren on here) were in physics and just cracked up at that point, got a few odd looks from the teacher, oh well.

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hahaha, I thought this was going to be a serious series when i submitted my battle brother. If you use him, I am excited to see his part in this madness. This is great Leethal LOL!!!! Keep up the good work.

 

I am picturing sanford and son, welcome back cotter, and all sorts of classic sitcoms wrapped up in the 40k universe. this is too good -_-

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Hey, this series is serious!

 

....Later on. Bunch new misfits every season, and the lone survivor of the last season gets to lead it. So who will survive?! WHO WILL DIE LIKE A DOG?!

 

Note: Pio will be dying in a future episode to spite the Salamander love fest PM's I've been getting.

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