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The Promethean Fists


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#1
FireFist

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THE PROMETHEANS

gallery_47148_3818_6548.jpgCHAPTER NAME: .............. PROMETHEANS.
GENE-SEED (PREDECESSOR): ... SALAMANDERS.
FOUNDING: .................. 19TH.
CHAPTER WORLD: ............. TURTHOL.
FORTRESS MONASTERY: ........ GONDHELM.
SPECIALTY :................. SIEGE OPERATIONS, ARMORED ASSAULT
KNOWN DESCENDANTS: ......... NONE
BATTLE CRY:................. FIRE AND FURY


“We are the will of the Emperor. His burning wrath is ours. Fire may pour from our fingers yet we remain unburned. Lightning may burst forth from our eyes yet we stand unhurt. The earth may tremble and the rock may split yet we shall not yield. In this burning inferno we stand defiantly in the face our enemies. The foes of the Emperor shall fall before us; for we know no fear. Their fortresses shall fall and their strongholds crumble before our fury. We are the angels of death. We are the Burning fists of the Emperor's holy wrath.”
-Creed of the Prometheans


T
he Prometheans were formed late in the 19th Founding from the Salamanders. When the new chapter was formed the Salamanders gave Captain Argos and ten marines leave to form the new chapter. Their travels were uneventful until they found a planet that reminded them of home. The planet was located in the Pyros system of the Ultima Segmentum. Though Pyros Tertious was the name given when imperial mappers first came through the name was changed to Turthol. After making planetfall the small unit of marines separated ways, each making their way to a town. It is known that three of them encountered the wandering tribes of the desert and traveled with them. Their task was simple: to learn as much as possible about the planet in ten days time before the rest of the Chapter made landfall to begin construction of their new home. As planned each checked-in at the agreed upon time triggering the final portion of the plan. Thunderhawks from the cruiser Undying Flame flew to a location mapped by their tech-marine and began to unload serfs and servitors to begin the construction of Gondhelm, the Chapter fortress. With the location settled the advance recon unit made their way to ground zero, each traveled with a small group of natives who had volunteered to help.

Chapter-Master Argos continued to use the chapter's armored units in the time-honored manner prescribed by the codex. But after several failed assaults against enemy fortifications and heavy losses of both troops and machines it was clear that changes were necessary. It was with considerable reluctance that Chapter Master Argos ordered the overhaul of the existing dreadnoughts with additional armor. Argos also requisitioned more land raider Redeemers, Crusaders, and boarding mantles, which he ordered the tech-marines to develop for siege operations. It was from this time of need that the Chapter's tech-marines began a long tradition of developing new innovative designs for their war machines.
 

The First Invasion of Turthol
When Orks invaded Turthol, Chapter Master Argos himself led the advance alongside the chapter’s dreadnoughts. At some time during the invasion the Ork Warboss broke Argos’ relic blade. Afterward it’s said that Argos spent the entire night in the company forges with the chapter’s most senior tech-marine. When he emerged he wielded a halberd that had been combined with a bolter placed up towards the blade. Argos reasoned that the bolter could be used both up close and at a distance yet he would still be able to fight with the halberd. After weeks of bloody fighting the Orks were finally defeated. The Promethean Fists had taken heavy of casualties. It would take some time before the chapter was back up to full strength, but the Chapter's spirit was not yet broken. This would not be the last Invasion Turthol would feel

Homeworld

Turthol is a desert world located in the Ultima Segmentum, whose wildlife is dominated by massive scorpions and monstrous serpents. The surface of Turthol is dotted with ruins and oases. The majority of Turthol's population is centered on the few oases large enough to support anything more than a small city. Still a good sized portion of its people chose to travel in nomadic groups or live in small communities near smaller oases. Those that choose to travel as nomads migrate to the small communities and cities when the time comes for the Promethean Fists to recruit from the planets population. The chapter values hard work, determination, even individuality.

The Prometheans maintain a fortress monastery named Gondhelm. The fortress relies on three different oases located near the fortress to support it's community of initiates, scouts, and marines. The ruins that dot the sands act as more places to train the marines of the chapter. The ruins are of a pre-Imperial society long since vanished when exploratory teams first found the planet. Sandstorms whip across the deserts, increasing in frequency and intensity as the planet nears the sun. During the worst of the sandstorms entire clans maybe wiped out.

Combat Doctrine

"They descended on wings of fire. Their weapons blazed with cleansing flames. They smashed into the orks like blood covered boulders. They danced like fire among our foes. In the end they stood like bloody statues among fields of death and destruction. They were truly angels of death." ~ Commander Johnstenn of the Turthol militia, Second Invasion of Turthol.

Recent events had made it abundantly clear to the Chapter Master that they needed heavier armor and more assault units. With addition of more assault troops, the Prometheans added more armor to their dreadnoughts and converted some of their Land Raiders to Crusaders and Redeemers so they could support the troops that attacked the enemy head on. The Promethean Fists Have always been stubborn, making their foe pay in blood for the merest inch of ground. Yet contrary to other fast assault chapters the Prometheans rarely use drop pods as they do not have the space to carry the siege mantles, used by the 'Siege Breakers'.

The Book & Cog (black/white temporarily)
gallery_47148_3818_9531.jpg

In addition strains placed on the armory and it's contingent of tech-marines have resulted in the absence of land speeders.

The troops of the Prometheans excel at advancing through fields of fire that other commanders would be keen to avoid. The enemy is effectively run over by a wave of steel and ceramite. Each Company has a unit dedicated to the art of siege breaking. Usually comprising of four squads, siege breaker units can range from tactical squads to devastators to assault squads. All are armed with siege mantles, heavily armored versions of boarding mantles, that at times have held even against las-cannon shots. Assaults undertaken by these units are accompanied by Dreadnoughts and Land Raiders. Ironclads feature prominently as their seismic hammers and chainfists are invaluable in opening breaches in enemy defenses. Crusaders, often carrying units of terminators, are usually a siege assault units main source of close-in ranged support while the Land Raider Kurske, a plasma cannon armed variant created by Chapter tech-marines, provides heavy ranged support alongside any devastator units. Such advances are relentless as the heavily armored wall of ceramite and steel advances through storms of fire that would normally see high casualties.

Heraldry

Troubled Times
Fifty-nine years after the Ork invasion of Turthol, the planet was assaulted by an enemy far worse than the greenskins. The darklings had come to the Pyros System. Dark Eldar forces appeared through out the system, it seemed one archon had a score to settle with the descendants of the Salamanders. With the recent death of the Chapter's second Chapter Master the Promethean Fists were in disarray. Tech-marine Eiríkr, Master of the Forge, identified the severity of the threat and called a halt to the political maneuvering before placing himself as temporary commander of the Chapter's forces. Within a few months the Dark Eldar had been eradicated from the Pyros System.

In the initial days of building the chapter Chapter-Master Argos sat with the rest of his marines who had joined him in building the chapter. Unanimously they preferred to be less ostentatious than other chapters and so chose their current color of brown. It was also a way to connect themselves with their human origins and not become so aloof as they have seen many chapters become. The red trim was added later in remembrance of those who fell in the First Invasion of Turthol.

Organization

The Prometheans are similar to the Salamanders in the organization of their chapter. They only have 8 companies except they have the 110 marines per company. They also have a scout company of 70 scouts.
As usual 1st company is the Veteran Company. 2nd, 3rd, and 4th companies are active combat companies. The 5th and 6th companies are reserve companies. Company is denoted by numbers on the knee. The Captain of the 1st Company is also Captain of the Chapter Master's elite Honor Guard. The Guard accompany their Chapter Master in battle, on secret missions, and other private chapter business.

Promethean chaplains have a special retinue of 5 Marines who travel with him and learn from him. The Master of Sanctity has a retinue of 10 Marines. These Marines are led by the chaplain into battle no matter what. It is from this retinue that the next chaplain is chosen in the event of his death. Chaplains are chosen by a Tribunal of the surviving Chaplains; more often than not successors are chosen by their previous Chaplain. In order to distinguish them from other marines their helmets are painted black when they enter service with the Chaplain. When a Marine in the retinue dies his helmet is saved until the Chaplain's next return to Gondhelm. Once at Gondhelm the helmet is inscribed with it's bearer's name before being interred in a special crypt located in a nearby set of ruins.

Beliefs

"What is the price of a mile in this galaxy? The price is the blood of hundreds. Nothing in this galaxy is free. Every day of you life will be filled with death in the name of the Emperor. This is how your life will end, with a bolter in hand facing the enemies of the Imperium." ~Chaplain Greck, 4th Company, speaking to new recruits

The Prometheans view religion as merely a moral guide. They believe that faith without deeds is worthless, and therefore that the Emperor is better worshiped on the battlefield than with prayer. To these ends the chapter sings their praises as war songs on the battlefield. Whether this is tradition from their planet or a bond of brotherhood is unknown. But on their campaigns their voices raise in song in service of the Emperor.

The Chapter views knowledge as not just a tool but a way to raise the Imperium back to a Golden Age. After a battle their marines are often seen scouring the ruins for tomes, books, and other such resources to add to the chapter's growing library. They don't view xenos knowledge as heretical and so have even taken Eldar writings into their "custody".

Technology

Due to the ingenuity and inventiveness of their tech-marines the Prometheans have created a number of vehicles of war. These are used solely by the Promethean Fists as the Mechanicus has not sanctioned any of the designs. The Chapter's tech-marines are constantly searching for ways to improve their machines of war, they are even known to have a tendency to fiddle with parts or impulsively improve vehicles. These marines are pulled from the natural inventors of the nomadic tribes and cities.

The Tech-marines of the Promethean Fists often are assigned to lead strike forces, assignments the tech-marines fall to with zeal as opportunities to test new configurations on vehicles and even infantry load-outs that are not always successful at first but by the end of the conflict are perfected and ready to join the final crushing strike. Even individual marines tinker with their armor in attempts to improve it. This readiness to redesign their equipment has been frowned on by the Mechanicus, though it may be hard to doubt that such new configurations have increased the effectiveness of the Chapter's fighting forces. Even with the forgeworld of Pyros Technicus as a neighboring planet, the strained relationship with the Mechanicus has forced the Prometheans to produce the majority of their war material.


The Librarium Technologica

Due to a practically non-existent presence of psykers the Prometheans have no Psychic units. Some, like the apothecaries argue that it is due to a sudden mutation in the gene-seed stocks. Others, namely the chaplains, argue that it is the Emperor's will that they have no psykers. In truth the population of Turthol have thus far only produced a small number of potential librarians. The aspirants have all died either during training or their bodies have rejected the gene-seed.

In the absence of Librarians the Chapter's core of Tech-marines has grown far larger than that of an average chapter. Their role has broadened to include the upkeep and translation of the Chapter Librarium, and the production of equipment for the chapter armory. These new tasks have greatly stretched the available tech-marines. The 'Inner Circle' of tech-marines attempted to alleviate the problem by making training in mechanics and repairs a mandatory part of the training regimen. Even so, the majority of the marines still only know how to conduct basic repairs. Any major problems still require the administrations of the full fledged tech-marines.

[STATUS: Retrieving]...Locating Files...[STATUS]


Edited by FireFist, 13 July 2014 - 07:50 PM.

"We are the Burning fists of the Emperor's holy wrath and we shall know no fear."
- from Creed of the Prometheans


I came up with the design of the Ussal before Forge World came out with the Tauros


#2
Telveryon

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Blow for blow battle descriptions are generally frowned upon around here, they make good short stories but not IA. Three sentences would be quite sufficient for the description of the battle.

Iron Gauntlet IA: Harbingers of Woe

Proud owner of the The Golden Defenders (everyone's favorite faithless bastards, favorite because I'm pretty sure their the only ones) and the Will of the Lost (everyone's second favorite skeletal marines, Apothete stole the limelight with his Black Friars)

#3
FireFist

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just up dated my post enjoy

Edited by FireFist, 12 February 2012 - 11:07 PM.

"We are the Burning fists of the Emperor's holy wrath and we shall know no fear."
- from Creed of the Prometheans


I came up with the design of the Ussal before Forge World came out with the Tauros


#4
Telveryon

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They settled on a planet named Chernobyl and began to build the chapter there.

Word to the wise, be a little more discrete. Plunking down names like Chernobyl breaks suspension of disbelief something fierce.

Afterward it’s said that Argos spent the entire night in the company forges. When he emerged he wielded a halberd modeled after the original guardian spears of the Adeptus Custodes.

Two major issues here, how would a Chapter Master know how to forge such a weapon in just one night and secondly and would he know how the original halberds of the Custodes looked like?

After weeks of bloody fighting in the rain the orks were finally defeated. During the fighting a missile slammed into honored-brother Barros, destroying him instantly. It was this event that caused Argos to see that without the extra armor provided by the ironclad, dreadnoughts would never be able to support the assault units on the battle field.

And why didn't all chapters reach the same conclusion? Personally I find this as a weak excuse to say that you only have Ironclads, something that add very little to your chapter overall...

The unpainted armor of the marines had been stained brown by the mud of Chernobyl. Only the Chapter Masters armor was yet red with blood. A red trim could still be seen on the marines and their weapons were also still red. This was the way they would remain and all their armor would be, brown with red trim.

A chapter's heraldry is usually decided either during or just after its creation, it's definitely already decided upon before they go to their first engagement.

Chernobyl is a desert world. It is about the size of Holy Terra though it is slightly closer to the sun than Terra. Chernobyl is home to a population of around 3,550,000 people not including the chapters marines, scouts, and personnel stationed on the planet.

Such exact numbers aren't exactly necessary as they add next to nothing to the chapter itself.

After early events concerning the Promethean Fists the Chapter Master decided they needed heavier armor and more assault units. With addition of more assault troops, the Promethean Fists added more armor to their dreadnoughts and converted their Land Raiders to Crusaders so they could support the troops that attacked the enemy head on.

Just one battle is a very weak excuse for such changes, not only that, but these changes would be rather limiting to the effectiveness of the chapter.

This method of fighting has caused considerable tension between the chapter and their mentors the Salamanders. Yet the Promethean Fists continue to fight as they have. This style still remains flexible depending on the enemies faced by the chapter. On ocasion they may send Tactical squads ahead in rhinos to secure the objective.

And why would the Salamanders be bothered by how your chapter fights?

The Promethean Fists are similar to the Salamanders in the organization of their chapter. They only have 5 companies except they have 100 men not the usual 120 marines that the Salamanders have. They also have a scout company of 50 scouts.
As usual 1st company is the Veteran company. 2nd, 3rd, and 4th companies are active combat companies. And 5th company is the reserve company.

That again seems rather limiting... What's the reason behind their low numbers?


Gene Seed
The Promethean Fists are decedent from the Salamanders chapter. They hold close to the teachings of Vulkan but have added their own bit to their tactics. They still keep to the heavy support ideals yet progress the battle rapidly with fast attack.

This has nothing to do with Gene-Seed but rather Combat Doctrine. In this section you should talk about any deviations of the gene-seed if they are any.

Iron Gauntlet IA: Harbingers of Woe

Proud owner of the The Golden Defenders (everyone's favorite faithless bastards, favorite because I'm pretty sure their the only ones) and the Will of the Lost (everyone's second favorite skeletal marines, Apothete stole the limelight with his Black Friars)

#5
FireFist

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Word to the wise, be a little more discrete. Plunking down names like Chernobyl breaks suspension of disbelief something fierce.

I don't really understand what you mean. and besides the name is staying.

Just one battle is a very weak excuse for such changes, not only that, but these changes would be rather limiting to the effectiveness of the chapter.

just because one battle is mentioned above doesn't mean they've only had one battle. and how are the changes limiting?
"We are the Burning fists of the Emperor's holy wrath and we shall know no fear."
- from Creed of the Prometheans


I came up with the design of the Ussal before Forge World came out with the Tauros


#6
Telveryon

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Word to the wise, be a little more discrete. Plunking down names like Chernobyl breaks suspension of disbelief something fierce.

I don't really understand what you mean. and besides the name is staying.

Read this, it should answer your question

Just one battle is a very weak excuse for such changes, not only that, but these changes would be rather limiting to the effectiveness of the chapter.

just because one battle is mentioned above doesn't mean they've only had one battle. and how are the changes limiting?

Assault marines supported by Land Raider Crusaders is not a tactic that would always work. A chapter must be ready to face any threat in the galaxy, by having your chapter fight only in a certain way, you limit their utility. All chapter of legend excel at some form of fighting yet none of them are stuck in that form of fighting.

Iron Gauntlet IA: Harbingers of Woe

Proud owner of the The Golden Defenders (everyone's favorite faithless bastards, favorite because I'm pretty sure their the only ones) and the Will of the Lost (everyone's second favorite skeletal marines, Apothete stole the limelight with his Black Friars)

#7
Tyrannicide

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I can tell you right now, although the Salamanders are an understanding Chapter, they wouldn't be so quick to give your Chapter forty Astartes for their founding. They're well under strength, and it wouldn't be the brightest idea if their Chapter Master decided to provide almost half a Company's worth of Space Marines to some fledgling Chapter.

Edited by Darth Potato, 15 July 2009 - 08:12 PM.

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#8
FireFist

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well then what do you suggest i name the planet then? i personally like the current name but apparently others don't. question is someone else using that name?
"We are the Burning fists of the Emperor's holy wrath and we shall know no fear."
- from Creed of the Prometheans


I came up with the design of the Ussal before Forge World came out with the Tauros


#9
Tyrannicide

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well then what do you suggest i name the planet then? i personally like the current name but apparently others don't. question is someone else using that name?

I agree the name 'Chernobyl' is a nice one. Just one that doesn't fit flawlessly in the 40k universe, when it already has ties to the current day and age. It's something that you should consider trying not to do in the future. Just look around for new names, or if your that attached to 'Chernobyl', try creating a bastardized form of it like 'Chernoblis' for example.

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#10
Nicili

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Chernobyl is a desert world. It is about the size of Holy Terra though it is slightly closer to the sun than Terra.


This doesn't make sense to me. I assume that Chernobyl is closer to its own sun than Terra is. But, what you are saying, is that Chernobyl is part of the Solar System and is closer to the sun than Terra is. Just something for you to clear up.

On the topic of the homeworld name, why Chernobyl? Why is it so important? For me, I keep thinking of mutations and nuclear fall-out. While if you used, as Darth Potato said, something like "Chernoblis", I still think it isn't adding anything important to the chapter overall.

Personally, I like the name Gondhelm better, its unique. and people won't have a preconcieved notion about the name.

Just a thought.

#11
FireFist

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ok concidering the fact that everyone agrees that Chernobyl is a bad name I shall change it when I think of a better name.

Edit: I have changed the name to Turthol or Sereghold. How does that sound?

Edited by FireFist, 16 July 2009 - 07:00 PM.

"We are the Burning fists of the Emperor's holy wrath and we shall know no fear."
- from Creed of the Prometheans


I came up with the design of the Ussal before Forge World came out with the Tauros


#12
FireFist

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ok I've made ssome adjustments. but still need to figure out name.

Turthol or Sereghold?

Edit: official name is now Tuthol.

Edited by FireFist, 18 July 2009 - 05:11 AM.

"We are the Burning fists of the Emperor's holy wrath and we shall know no fear."
- from Creed of the Prometheans


I came up with the design of the Ussal before Forge World came out with the Tauros


#13
FireFist

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Looks like my IA is complete. I might put up a version 2.0 post of the IA up.
"We are the Burning fists of the Emperor's holy wrath and we shall know no fear."
- from Creed of the Prometheans


I came up with the design of the Ussal before Forge World came out with the Tauros


#14
Telveryon

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If you say so, personally I don't see anything that makes them truly unique. Also, the reason behind the chapter's combat doctrine is rather thin, just one battle is unlikely to sway a chapter from the teachings of the Codex Astartes, the most comprehensive book on war ever written.

Edited by Telveryon, 19 July 2009 - 05:53 AM.


Iron Gauntlet IA: Harbingers of Woe

Proud owner of the The Golden Defenders (everyone's favorite faithless bastards, favorite because I'm pretty sure their the only ones) and the Will of the Lost (everyone's second favorite skeletal marines, Apothete stole the limelight with his Black Friars)

#15
Ace Debonair

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Well, it appears I've read the edited version rather than the original, but I must say it seems much better for it. :huh:

Perhaps having a brief mention of other dreadnought-disabling tactics used by the enemy in the run-up to that battle would help - make it seem more like losing dreadnoughts was a frequent problem for the chapter, almost even pushing them into armouring them up more.

Although something else to help distinguish the chapter could also help. They're not over-powered or silly, which is both rare and very good. But as Telveryon says, maybe a more distinguishing feature for the chapter may help, such as perhaps a heavier reliance on power fists (inspired by the chapter's name) perhaps even two - one in grey, one in red (a fist of steel and a fist of fire) for their comamnders? Or even a heavy bias in favour of polearms, similar to the one used by the chapter master in your story?

Feel free to either use or ignore my ideas - I'm new to this, after all. :D

#16
FireFist

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I might just use some of your ideas Ace Debonair. I admit I was kinda running out of ideas for the IA.
"We are the Burning fists of the Emperor's holy wrath and we shall know no fear."
- from Creed of the Prometheans


I came up with the design of the Ussal before Forge World came out with the Tauros


#17
Lord Chrisius III

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If you say so, personally I don't see anything that makes them truly unique. Also, the reason behind the chapter's combat doctrine is rather thin, just one battle is unlikely to sway a chapter from the teachings of the Codex Astartes, the most comprehensive book on war ever written.


dude you need to chill out, you're taking all the fun out of creating your own chapter
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#18
Apothete

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dude you need to chill out, you're taking all the fun out of creating your own chapter


Actually, Telveryon is providing valuable and well-reasoned critique on a homebrew Chapter, which is entirely within both the rules and the intent of this forum. He's gotten relatively well known around these parts for doing exactly that, and I have to say that I consider what he has to say to be generally insightful, useful, and completely in line with what we're supposed to be doing.

You, however, are trying to silence someone who is merely answering the author's implied request for review. That's neither useful nor is it particularly your job. Happily for us all, both you and Telveryon are as free to keep posting your opinions as I am! Isn't it wonderful when we can all weigh in with what we think, as long as we keep our posts on topic?

“We are the mail about his fist. We are the edge of his sword, the tip of his spear. His word is our shield as we are the blade. We are the instrument of his will. We are the Bane of his foes, the saviors of his people. In vengeance be true, in valour be strong. Purge them with flame, and crush them with fists of steel. With hearts of stone and hands of flame we do His will. We are the burning fists of the Emperors holy wrath. And we shall know no fear.”


Telveryon seems to have missed it, but this is borderline stealing from the Grey Knights' catechisms.

I am the hammer, I am the hate
I am the woes of deamonkind, I am the right hand of my Emperor
The instrument of His will, the gauntlet about His fist
The tip of His spear, the edge of His sword
From the frenzy, temptation, corruption and deceit
Deliver us, our Emperor, that the enemy might face us in Your wrath

I am the hammer, I am the sword in His hand
I am the point of His spear, I am the gauntlet about His fist
I am the bane of His foes and the woes of the treacherous
I am the end


Also...

I am the hammer
I am the right hand of my Emperor
I am the the instrument of his will
The gauntlet about his fist
The tip of his spear
The edge of his sword

I am his sword just as he is my armour
I am the his wrath just as he is my zeal
I am the hate
I am the woes of daemonkind

I am the hammer
The sword in his hand
I am the bane of his foes
The woes of the treacherous

I am the hammer
I am the sword
I am the shield
I am the soldier of the battle at the end of the time

I am the Exitus!


Edited by Apothete, 22 July 2009 - 04:53 AM.

You just had to look around you, Grey Knight, and you'd have seen it. What is Chaos? Suffering, you might say. Oppression. Deceit. But could not all of these things be said of your Imperium?
-Ghargatuloth, Prince of a Thousand Faces, Grey Knights.

The Exonerators Index Astartes WIP + The Inscrutable Index Traitoris WIP + The Black Friars Index Astartes WIP


#19
FireFist

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yes Apothete some of this I took from some of the different "I am the Hammer" prayers I have heard and seen my brother find. But I only used the prayers as ideas for the creed. only some of the liners are probably the same otherwise some of them are definitely similar. So just calm down from what I know only one (maybe 2) line(s) is(are) the same from one version of the prayer.

otherwise I'm glad I'm getting comments but hey no one is perfect so some of you just need to be less hard on me. I'm trying not to steal other peoples ideas so calm.

P.S. what are the side effects of the Salamanders gene-seed?

Edited by FireFist, 22 July 2009 - 03:05 AM.

"We are the Burning fists of the Emperor's holy wrath and we shall know no fear."
- from Creed of the Prometheans


I came up with the design of the Ussal before Forge World came out with the Tauros


#20
Apothete

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yes Apothete some of this I took from some of the different "I am the Hammer" prayers I have heard and seen my brother find. But I only used the prayers as ideas for the creed. only some of the liners are probably the same otherwise some of them are definitely similar. So just calm down from what I know only one (maybe 2) line(s) is(are) the same from one version of the prayer.


Calm down?

Everything that has been said in relation to your writeup has been deliberate, relatively easy going, and about as over the top as a single brick at the foot of a wall. If you don't want serious criticism of your creation, then you might want to specify that at the beginning of the writeup. This forum doesn't exist just to pat you on the back for what you've created, but rather to help you improve upon it.

otherwise I'm glad I'm getting comments but hey no one is perfect so some of you just need to be less hard on me. I'm trying not to steal other peoples ideas so calm.


I'll ask you directly, right here.

Do you or do you not want the more experienced members of the board to help you? If you do, be prepared for the kind of criticism that we bring.
You just had to look around you, Grey Knight, and you'd have seen it. What is Chaos? Suffering, you might say. Oppression. Deceit. But could not all of these things be said of your Imperium?
-Ghargatuloth, Prince of a Thousand Faces, Grey Knights.

The Exonerators Index Astartes WIP + The Inscrutable Index Traitoris WIP + The Black Friars Index Astartes WIP


#21
FireFist

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Hey I'm glad I'm getting this criticism only thing is sometimes you guys seem ready to argue. I tell you this keep the criticism coming, just be helpful.
"We are the Burning fists of the Emperor's holy wrath and we shall know no fear."
- from Creed of the Prometheans


I came up with the design of the Ussal before Forge World came out with the Tauros


#22
Telveryon

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Apothete's criticism is always helpful (I'm quite sure it's in the legislation of several countries) and he never argues, he debates, which is rather different.

Iron Gauntlet IA: Harbingers of Woe

Proud owner of the The Golden Defenders (everyone's favorite faithless bastards, favorite because I'm pretty sure their the only ones) and the Will of the Lost (everyone's second favorite skeletal marines, Apothete stole the limelight with his Black Friars)

#23
Ace Debonair

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Well, for my part, I'm glad I could help with the ideas. The double-power fist thing is something I've often thought about, I just thought it might fit in with the chapter.
I also very much liked the fist-of-steel-fist-of-fire line. ;)

I certainly understand where FireFist is coming from - it's always a horrible feeling when you spend hours working on something only for others to go "that's not right, and what's the deal with this?". :o

That said, I'll cheerfully admit it's a neccessary evil. Sometimes it's not even that a particular point is a bad idea, it's just an idea in the wrong place, and from what I've read elsewhere on the forum, both Apothete and Telveryon are generally on the ball with their comments. When posting ideas, you just have to take the bad with the good.

Trial by fire, you might say. :)

I'd personally have to agree that another battle or two leading up to reforming the chapter's battle plans could really strengthen the chapter. Something (perhaps) along the lines of:

"Although greatly shaken by the loss of Brother Barros, chapter master Argos continued to use dreadnoughts in the time-honoured manner perscribed by the codex. But after several conflicts with the orks (and maybe someone else) it became apparent that the dreadnoughts were the enemy's first choice of target - frequently employing powerful anti-armour weapons/tactics to destroy or disable them. It was with considerable reluctance that Chapter Master Argos ordered the overhaul of the existing dreadnoughts with additional armour."

Or, you know, words to that effect.

Again, feel free to use or ignore these ideas, they are but the ramblings of a novice who likes a good story.

And I'm afraid my knowledge of the Salamanders is equalled only by my grasp of nuclear physics and brain surgery, so I can't offer any wisdom here. :huh:

#24
FireFist

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Nuclear physics? ;) what does that have to do with anything?

anyhow debating and arguing are the same stuff to me.

Edited by FireFist, 22 July 2009 - 07:13 PM.

"We are the Burning fists of the Emperor's holy wrath and we shall know no fear."
- from Creed of the Prometheans


I came up with the design of the Ussal before Forge World came out with the Tauros


#25
ChaplainMathreyn

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The Promethean Fists were formed late in the 19th Founding from the Salamanders.


Why did they need to be formed in the first place?... Maybe tie in the Orks that they fight later? They've been plagueing the XXX Sector... And why the Salamanders, and not, saaaay the more numerous Ultramarine or Imperial Fist geneseed? Just some food for thought!

Afterward it’s said that Argos spent the entire night in the company forges with the chapters most senior tech-marine. When he emerged he wielded a halberd that had been combined with a bolter placed up towards the blade. He was again ready for war.


The reforging thing is cool... But how did he get a bolter on it, and why would he need a bolter on it?... I don't know what you think about it, but what if the Ork Warboss stole away some pieces of the Argos' Blade, and they quest to try and get them back... ? Totally food for thought though!

During the fighting a missile slammed into honored-brother Barros, destroying him instantly.


Why should I care about Barros though? Other Brethren Marines might miss him, but this is the first time I've heard of him.. Was he a friend of Argos'?

But the Promethean Fists were not done yet. Immediately Argos ordered the chapters 4 battle ready companies to replace their losses and to set out into space. Chapter master Argos led 1st company against invading orks and the rising threat of the Tau.


This is also the first time I've heard about the Tau. Did they assist or take advantage of the orks Waaagh! to attack something? Destroy, or Steal something?

Although greatly shaken by the loss of Brother Barros, chapter master Argos continued to use dreadnoughts in the time-honoured manner perscribed by the codex.


Brother Barros... Why was he so important? Was he the other guy in the tent during the re-forging?

The Promethean Fists prefer hard, quick, often devastating assaults. They excel in melee and frontal assaults.


Like my Angels of Blood! Hurrah!

The sergeants of the chapter have a marked preference for pole arms and their odd fighting style.


This is the first time I've seen mentioned a preference towards polearms?... I saw Argos make one, but that was it. Do they prefer them because... The planet population does? They mimic what Argos made? When I think of 'polearms', halberds and billhooks in particular, I think defensive "stand fast" sort of fighting.

It was with considerable reluctance that Chapter Master Argos ordered the overhaul of the existing dreadnoughts with additional armour. Now the Promethean Fists chapter was truly born.


I'm not advocating a name change, but adding armor to the dreadnaughts enforced their name?... When I think 'Prometheus', I think of wily, almost tricky, thinking and bringing stuff to mortals...? Why did Argos name them the Promethean Fists?...

Just some food for thought for your next revisions!

Peace! :Troops:


Trial by fire, you might say.


Would you say things can get abit... Heated! Badum-dum!
No fear. No pity. No remorse.