Deathwatch: The RPG

[StrangeGuy]

#53: Someone will try to take a peek up the Dark Angel's skirt.

 

#54: The Blood Angel does not drink...... wine.

Edited September 8, 2010 by StrangeGuy

[KnightOfTheRealm]

Ok I know this will break up the rules but what is this game?

[Brother Nihm]

Ok I know this will break up the rules but what is this game?

I hereby bid you welcome from out under that rock!

 

Seriously though, click me!

[KnightOfTheRealm]

So if I am correct you create a character from a chapter with a speciality and then the person with the book does a story say for it. You role a dice to determine the outcome and then the story continues. So you don't actually play yourself apart from these instances lol? Sorry but I'm new to all of this so don't have a clue ;) as I would be interested as some of the story outcomes sound funny. Edited September 13, 2010 by KnightOfTheRealm

[The Normish]

#55: Someone will insist that their Blood Angels Apothecary has cured the Black Rage/Red Thirst.

#56: Space Marines will at some point eat their frag grenades, because they can.

[DarKHaZZ13]

#57: Someone will insits on being a chaplain. when someone fails for any reason, he will take them for counciling, guided meditation and brutal beating with a crozarious.

 

#58: Someone will want o be commande rof some variety. henceforth they will order about the other SM's *ie: get me a cup of tea. the primarch and the big E! command it.

 

#59: Somone will want to be the relicators, just to use daemon weapons

 

#60: somone will be lamenters, and then blame all their rubbish rolling on the curse of their geneseed.

 

I could go on all day

[StrangeGuy]

#58: Someone will want o be commande rof some variety. henceforth they will order about the other SM's *ie: get me a cup of tea. the primarch and the big E! command it.

 

Damn Ultramarines! :)

[Jonas Stromclaw]

#61: Someone will be a Space Wolf Wolfguard, so he can have the coolest close combat weapon ever (frost axe).

 

#62: Someone wil play an Alpha Legion infiltrated for the express purposes of having an excuse to steal said frost axe.

 

#63: Said Space Wolf player will proceed to beat Alpha Legionaire within an inch of his life or forfeit the frost axe.

[The Normish]

#64: Someone, in a fit of rage, will yell "SINDRIIII!"

 

Dawn of War makes for some good jokes.

[KhorneHunter57x]

#64: Someone, in a fit of rage, will yell "SINDRIIII!"

 

Dawn of War makes for some good jokes.

On a related note:

#65: Someone will refer to the vehicles as "Metal Boxes".

 

 

#66: Someone will want to play as a Grey Knight.

Edited September 14, 2010 by KhorneHunter57x

[spiros14]

#67: Whenever a player makes a bad decesion he will say "chaos made me do it."

[Ace Debonair]

#67: Whenever a player makes a bad decesion he will say "chaos made me do it."

Hah, nice. Let me contribute!

 

#68: Whenever something inexplicable happens, someone will say "A Chaos Sorcerer did it". :D

[Iron Lord]

#69: Someone will insist on quoting Starcraft at every opportunity (e.g. "Need a light?" for the guy with the flamer).

[Noctus Cornix]

# 70. Someone will play a space wolf character and read the Wolf-Tamer history option. Following this, said space wolf player will argue that he has a fenrisian wolf.

 

#70.5 Should the Dark Angel player see #70 being discussed, he will assume that the gm is allowing said space wolf to have the wolf (when infact he is not) and then demand he have a giant lion with him.

 

#71 Someone will play the Storm Wardens, see the Sacris Claymore and will hence forth play through the game with a thick Scottish accent and act as though he is Shaun Conery from Highlander.

 

#71.5 Said Storm Warden player will then ask if he can have a bagpipe in exchange for his bolt pistol

 

#72 Someone will insist upon allowing the GM to let them take relics of chapters they do not belong to

 

#73 Your party librarian WILL use smite and abuse it every chance he gets.... Even when its just to open a simple.... unlocked... wooden.... door.... to a orphanage....

 

#74 Someone will play an assault marine and then insist that the gm allows him to take a lascannon and shoot it while he is flying through the air

 

#75 Never tell the Space Wolf player that the hive tyrant stole his ale. he WILL..... somehow... someway... win.... alone...

 

(THIS WAS ALL BY PERSONAL TRUE EXPERIENCE)

 

P.S. God..... Damn.... Smite.....

[blackoption]

#76. One marine will gather ALL his interrogation material by eating the prisoner's brain.... Then comment on how it tastes like chicken

[Iron Lord]

#77 Someone will make Men In Black references at every opportunity:

"The difference between you and me? I make this armour look good."

[spiros14]

#78 Despite the pressing matter of *insert mission here* the Black templar player will want to go on a crusade

#79 Whoever has the flamer will develop an Arsonists personality

[Chengar Qordath]

Rule Number Four: Someone will ask if a Space Marine can have sex and will argue that he should be able to

 

Rule Number Seven: The first words uttered to the inquisitor by one of the players will be "Screw you, I'm Astartes."

 

Rule #16: Someone will want to play a Space Marine who turns out to be a Chaos worshipper. Or a Tau sympathizer. Or falls in love with an Eldar Farseer. Etc.

 

Rule #17: When someone dies, they instantly demand to be encased in dreadnought armour

 

19: He is the Chapter Master.

 

Rule #28: "We can hit on the Sisters of Battle, right?

 

Rule #36: GM: "No, you can't do that, that would screw the game up... :lol:"

Player: "But I'm a space marine! Cmon dude! They can do anything!"

 

#73 Your party librarian WILL use smite and abuse it every chance he gets.... Even when its just to open a simple.... unlocked... wooden.... door.... to a orphanage....

All of these have happened so far in the Deathwatch game I'm running, and we're only four session in.

 

Rule #80: Your techmarine will argue that he should be able to create/improve wargear for no cost.

 

Rule #81: If you spend more than fifteen minutes coming up with stats and a backstory for an antagonist, the first attack against him will produce multiple Righteous Furies and result in said antagonist being killed in one hit.

 

Rule #82: Every powergamer in your group will be either a Dark Angel of a Blood Angel.

[Lupercal Sanquine]

Rule #83: Your assault and/or tactical marine(s) will, at somepoint, during some firefight, use two bolt pistols 'gangsta style' and abuse the heck out of the two-weapon fighting rules.

 

Rule #84: Your Devastator marine will, at some point before firing cry out 'Say hello to my little friend!!'

 

Rule #85: Your Tactical marine player, having eventually statted himself out later on in the campaign to be a B****s leader with all the traits to match, will march forwards all heroicly, make a typical astartes comment either related to having no sense of trepidation towards the situation else mention their primarch, only to be critied and die at the hands of a mook.

[Chengar Qordath]

Rule #85: Your Tactical marine player, having eventually statted himself out later on in the campaign to be a B****s leader with all the traits to match, will march forwards all heroicly, make a typical astartes comment either related to having no sense of trepidation towards the situation else mention their primarch, only to be critied and die at the hands of a mook.

Add another one to the list of things that already happened in my game; the party's Librarian has really enjoyed finding ways to break the game; he's got a nicely statted up character, and tends to come up with nasty tricks that I don't always manage to catch beforehand. Then an Ork Boy managed to roll four Righteous Furies in a row; it doesn't matter how awesome your character is, taking over 60 damage = Death.

 

Rule #86: How well your players roll is directly proportional to how much it will screw up your current plans. They will routinely fail simple rolls you want them to pass, and always pass difficult rolls you expect them to fail.

 

Rule #87: Whenever you start pulling up creature stats, at least one member of your party will try to look over your shoulder to figure out what they'll have to deal with.

 

Then again, rule #87 can be turned to your advantage, such as pulling up the entry for Lictors, and then randomly asking the party to roll awareness tests at a -30. Making your party paranoid is a lot of fun...

[Grand Master Caloth]

I admit it, i am completely guilty of Rule 66...... -.-' God Emperor i wish it were possible, cause i am the ONLY GK player in my group and in most of my area.

And as to rule 81.... out Tac Marine one-shotted a Lord of Change.... -.- VERY depressing. lol

 

Rul 88: The DA Librarian will inevitably make the one Fetch Joke too many to the SW, and will proceed to be balled up (Damned Emo-angel jus doesnt know when to shut up, for Emperor's sake)

 

Rule 89: On the ONE Gift of Chaos spell you manage to get off, with the most amazing chance to kill of the prime leadership character, GM, you will roll the ONE mutation that actually HELPS the character (our GM rolled "Feel No Pain" for my SW Techmarine. lol)

[embalancer]

rule 90: Any use of the Omophagea must be served with some fava beans and a nice Chinti

[spiros14]

#91 the blood angel player will simply say any vehicle he gets in is atomatically fast

[Kitchensink]

92. Someone will whine or joke when another player chooses a chapter he doesn't like.

93. Someone will suggest sacrificing a calf and slitting its throat to appease the Dice God.

93.5. Someone will actually sacrifice a calf and slit its throat to appease the Dice God.

[Chengar Qordath]

rule 90: Any use of the Omophagea must be served with some fava beans and a nice Chinti

Rule 94: A player will attempt to use the Omophagea to make his character acquire one or more Xenos traits, such as arguing that a character who eats pieces of every Ork he kills should eventually start to become Orky.

 

Rule 95: After surviving one or two hazardous situations, one of your players will become convinced of his own immortality, and loudly insist that his shooting-focused character should be able to solo a Mega-armored Warboss or three Necron Flayed Ones in close combat. When this results in Marine losing combat horribly, expect much complaining.