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Index Traitoris: Doomseekers


Odsox

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"All praise mighty Khorne!"




J
areth Kalybos, Dark Apostle of the Word Bearers legion, had always been ambitious, even for one devoted to the worship of the Dark Gods. During the months following the 9th failed Black Crusade, he was struck with a singular ambition: to gather a force of his own and lead a Ruinous Crusade deep into the Imperium, bypassing the Cadian Gate entirely and surpassing what he saw as Abaddon's needlessly protracted war of attrition. To this end he led his Host aboard their ancient battle-barge, the Bloodstained Spear, and with the blessing of the Chaos Gods travelled from the daemon world Sicarus to Verrat, a planet where the balance of the Ruinous Powers was in constant flux.

Kalybos and half of his Host made landfall on Verrat, sanctifying their encampment with a full day of ritual, and within hours their slaves had raised a monument to the Dark Gods, a beacon to the warring factions already on the planet. Kalybos dispatched his most trusted lieutenants to entreat the most prominent Champions of the Powers with an invitation to join his Host and embark on his Ruinous Crusade.

The arrival of the Blood God's emissary was the most anticipated; Kalybos had sent his deadliest warrior, Bulledin Wrek of the Anointed, clad in blessed terminator armour, to achieve the treaty. After four hours, Wrek returned, beaten and bloody, alongside a hulking warrior dressed in the flayed skin of his enemies and dragging a colossal chain axe through the sand behind him. Warlord Graven had, after a brutal contest resulting in a stalemate, agreed to speak with Kalybos.

Salacious Hark, a Word Bearer gifted greatly by the Dark Prince with the speed of a striking snake and the silver tongue of a diplomat, was sent to entreat the leader of the Sabaoth Du'Thu'a. The Du'Thu'a had achieved something rare in their constant battles with Graven's bloodlusting warriors; a stalemate. Kalybos dispatched Hark to bring these formidable followers of Slaanesh to his side so that the Dark Apostle's skill and fervour might persuade them to set aside their age-old hatred.

Hark never returned. As night fell on Verrat, a speck of eldritch pink light appeared on the horizon, rapidly growing larger. A massive force of warriors and daemons was approaching the Host, cavorting daemonettes and slavering, sprinting Steeds making up the bulk of the army, while traitor marines in the gaudy colours of the Sabaoth Du'Thu'a marched alongside, led by their champion.

This, then, was the response from Carys Lustingclaw, dark mistress of the Sabaoth Du'Thu'a and devotee of Slaanesh, the God of Excess. Lustingclaw herself was at the forefront of this force, astride a luridly painted bike and flanked by a sextet of Fiends, with the ominous, beautiful form of a Keeper of Secrets following closely behind. As the Pleasure God's worshippers drew closer, the fate of Kalybos' final emissary was revealed; Salacious Hark had been chained to the front of Lustingclaw's vehicle, screaming in agonistic ecstasy, his ribcage cracked and split wide like some gory tome.

Marshalling his forces and galvanising them with a roaring prayer to the Pantheon of Chaos, Kalybos led his Host from the encampment and prepared to face the oncoming foe.

The two sides crashed together with the force of a thunderstorm. Eldritch energies flashed and crackled as sorcerers of both armies let fly with the gifts of their patrons and warriors of every calibre fought with the strength and speed of nightmares given form. As the battle raged on, Kalybos fought his way to the centre seeking the head of Lustingclaw, determined to take her life as payment for her insult to the glory of Chaos Undivided. Accompanied by Lord Wrek and the hulking brutality of Warlord Graven, the Dark Apostle smashed foes aside with his Accursed Crozius, reaping a fearsome tally among the followers of Slaanesh.

Without warning, Kalybos found himself face-to-face with Lustingclaw's most dangerous ally; the Keeper of Secrets. The Greater Daemon lashed out at the Apostle and his companions, sensuous beauty mixed with the grotesque touch of its master, flinging Lord Wrek - still enclosed within his terminator armour - aside as though he were a rag doll, and hammering its curved sword down onto Warlord Graven. The Blood God's champion roared with frustrated rage as he was forced to his knees and the tip of the daemon's sword sliced into his flesh, carving a line of gore from shoulder to hip. Graven collapsed at the Keeper's feet while the daemon bellowed its triumph and spun away, unconcerned by Kalybos' cries of zealous anger. With his dying breath, Graven reached up, grasping bloody-handed at Kalybos' robe, and implored him to give himself to Khorne. As his life ebbed away the fallen Warlord entreated the Dark Apostle.
"Give your life to Khorne, priest, and he will sunder your enemies. Succeed where I have failed," he croaked, spitting blood into his palm. He smeared the symbol of Khorne onto Kalybos' greave, choking on blood as he spoke his last.
"Blood for the Blood God.. Skulls.. for the Skull.. Throne..."
Confusion warred with fury in Kalybos' mind. The dying words of a berserker should mean nothing to a true follower of Chaos, but as his mind returned to the battle he saw that, miraculously, a ring of steel had formed around him. Lithe daemonettes clashed with lurching, roaring berserkers and the furious zealots of the Word Bearer Host. Blades and bullets flew everywhere, but Kalybos, Wrek and the corpse of the Warlord remained untouched. Perhaps there had been some weight to Graven's words.
Agony. Searing agony suddenly coursed through Kalybos' body and he stared down as the gore-streaked blade of the Keeper jutted from his chestplate. He could feel the massive trauma of his primary heart spitted on the blade and felt the disgustingly intimate touch of the Keeper's fingers against his armoured neck. As the monstrous daemon whispered words twisted by the power of the Dark Prince, Kalybos felt a surge of anger filling his soul. The agony of the Keeper's attack was burned away and the Dark Apostle gave vent to a roar that pierced even the clamour of the battle.
"All praise mighty Khorne! Blood for the Blood God!"
The Keeper reeled from the wounded Apostle, a sneer on its hideously beautiful features. Kalybos felt the burning rage of the Blood God coursing through his being, felt his blood boiling and a clap of thunder heralded the touch of the his new, true, patron.

~"He is No Brother of Mine!"~

Since the Doomseekers' rededication to the Lord of Skulls and their subsequent Crusade, word has reached the daemon world of Sicarus of their insurrection. The Dark Apostles of the Word Bearers have decreed that Kalybos, despite his ascension, be excommunicated from their ranks, and will offer no aid to his wayward Horde. While no direct action has been taken against the Doomhunter or his warriors yet, it is surely a matter of time before the Daemon Primarch Lorgar sends a contingent to punish Kalybos for his transgressions against the powers of Chaos Undivided...

A short, bloody, raging battle later and the warriors of Kalybos had all but annihilated the worshippers of the Pleasure God. It was only during this aftermath that Kalybos' forces discovered that Lustingclaw's body was missing. The servant of the weakling Flesh Lord had escaped. Regardless, hundreds of captives were taken from the limp remains of Lustingclaw's forces and marched back aboard the Bloodstained Spear, where the newly-ascended Daemon Prince led his forces in a dark prayer to the Lord of Skulls. Every captive was murdered and their blood fed into the engine of the great craft, re-baptising the ancient battle-barge the Axe of God and initiating its birth as a howling, raging beast-ship of Khorne.

Kalybos lead his Host, now a Horde of bloodlusting zealots devoted to the Lord of Skulls, in a rapturous crusade of slaughter and death. This began with a knife-thrust into the Gothic Sector, which, against all odds and perhaps at the fickle whim of his new patron, was met by a massed Imperial defence consisting of Loyalist Astartes from the White Consuls, Space Wolves and stoic Imperial Guardsmen of the Mordian Iron Guard. This combined force stymied and repelled the Horde's advance, spurring Kalybos into a fit of rage and despair which saw the death of another of his Hordemasters.

Desperate to atone for this failure, the Daemon Prince leads the Horde on a Death Crusade, believing that the only way to receive Khorne's forgiveness is to die in a truly epic battle. Thus the Horde of Kalybos was renamed the Doomseekers, painting their armour a combination of brass and blood-red, trimmed in bleached bone to signify their deathly fanaticism.

To this day the Doomseekers are still engaged in their heretical Crusade, roaming the depths of space in search of a death that might yet appease mighty Khorne.

Homeworld


T
he Doomseekers crusade throughout the Imperium aboard their ancient battle-barge, the Axe of God. This great vessel, once a Word Bearers craft named the Bloodstained Spear, has borne the Horde through fire and death time and time again since their bloody withdrawal from the Word Bearers Legion. The Axe is their only home in these times of slaughter and worship; an aeons-old craft from before the Horus Heresy, manned by warp-tainted amalgams of machine and flesh that are extensions of the Daemon Prince Kalybos' monstrous will.

~The Axe of God~

I Hunger.

The Hunter Feeds Me Soon.
Not Enough Blood From the Flesh-Things. Never Enough. Always The Seekers Bring Me Fresh Blood.
Never Enough.
Soon The Hunter Finds More Of The Flesh-Things. They Run. Hide Under Earth. Not Hidden. Not Hidden From The Seekers.
They Will Bring Blood.
More Blood. Soon.

I Hunger.

The battle-barge and its path is determined by Kalybos the Doomhunter, for he alone has the strength of will and the cold, controlling rage required to manipulate the old beast as it sojourns through space. When the chance for a truly epic doom arises, Kalybos departs to seize this opportunity and the duty of mastering the Axe falls to Hordemaster Braca Skah, 5th of Kalybos' lieutenants and a master of void warfare. While Skah is more than capable of directing any craft, without its true master the warped machine spirit of the Axe rails at its bonds and can only be aimed rather than controlled.

In order to appease the Axe's battle-hungry spirit, every inch of the great vessel is sanctified with blood, the most precious of resources to the followers of Khorne. The great enginarium walls are decorated with the flayed and drained remains of sacrifices to both the machine-spirit and the Blood God, and on days of celebration the Horde gathers within the fleshy cavern of the enginarium, coralling hundreds of slaves and captives around the beast-ship's pulsating machine heart. The Doomseekers give thanks to the Axe and to Khorne by conducting the Rites Vitae and slaughtering every last captive in an orgy of religious violence. Channels carved into the floor of the enginarium funnel the sacred blood into the machine heart, glutting the Axe with sustenance and strengthening its bonds to the Horde.

Combat Doctrine


"You can never have too many knives." - Aspiring Champion Golen



T
he Doomseekers are assault specialists, throwing themselves into every fight with a fervour that terrifies their enemies as only servants of Khorne can. Before each battle, each brother within a squad ritually bleeds himself, anointing his weaponry in order to awaken the vicious spirits within and to invoke the Lord of Skulls' blessing. The Horde's squads, while more than capable of utilising bolters and ranged weaponry, prefer to engage the enemy with axe and pistol, the better to take skulls for their patron deity. They are dedicated to sacrificing themselves in the name of Khorne and every failed opportunity to do so causes them shame.

One of the Doomseekers' most feared and devastating tactics is the use of a ritual referred to as the Rites Vitae. This is a raucous, barking chant used by the Blood God's warriors during battle and is led by their Champions, which inspires the fearless warriors to feats of ferocity that rival those of their erstwhile allies, Khorne's Berzerkers.

Once the Rites Vitae are begun, no enemy, no intervening force, no ill-favoured bystander shall be spared the wrath of the Doomseekers. The recitation of the Rites results in swathes of destruction as the warriors of Khorne abandon all pretense of pious sophistication and enter a near-berserk state of fervour, and it is through this ritual that their greatest glories have been accomplished. The resolution of the Kainite Invasion would have been impossible were it not for the descent of the Doomseekers upon the Imperial lines, each warrior screaming the Rites Vitae as they burst from the jagged mouths of dreadclaw drop pods to slaughter their hated Imperial foes.

Chapter Organisation


~The Hordemasters~

Eight lords rule the Horde in Kalybos' name, leading them from battle to battle in search of a grand demise. They are mighty warriors and villains all, merciless in their worship of the Lord of Skulls, and bow to none save the Daemon Prince Kalybos. The most favoured of the Hordemasters is without doubt the man known as Bulledin Wrek, Lord of the Chosen. His position is coveted, and rightly so, by his brethren, though only two Hordemasters have the gall or the skill to challenge him.

Hordemaster Rahab Goretalon, Clawleader of the Horde's bloodlusting Raptors and a grinning psychopath whose skin is layered with scripture from the Eight Books of Blood, would murder anyone to advance his position in the eyes of Khorne and the Doomhunter, and Wrek is no threat to his twisted mind.

The other is 3rd Hordemaster Turel, undoubtedly the Horde's finest swordsman and one of the few members of the Doomseekers to have been present during the Great Heresy. Turel is a pious warrior whose fervent belief in the Blood God is rumoured to fuel his battle prowess and he has never been defeated in single combat.


"He wields an axe that falls like lightning. When he takes to the field, skulls crack and blood runs thick. He hunts a mighty doom and by the Skull Throne, he will have it." ~ Hordemaster Wrek regarding the Doomhunter.



T
he Doomseekers are led by their mightiest warrior, the daemon prince Kalybos; the Doomhunter. Kalybos is revered amongst the Horde as their daemonic ideal, for with ascension comes the greatest power and the chance for a legendary death. His self-control is almost as revered as his battle prowess - only the strongest of minds can fight against the furious savagery that comes with such devotion to the Blood God, and Kalybos has channelled His power for nearly a thousand years since his departing from the ranks of the Word Bearers and ascending to daemonhood.

Lord Bulledin Wrek, the 1st Hordemaster, commands the Horde's elite, the Chosen. Garbed in crimson and bone-coloured suits of Terminator armour, these diabolical warriors are veterans of a thousand campaigns. Their prowess in close-combat is legendary even among their brethren. For them to have survived this long is considered a mark of Khorne's favour by some among the Horde, where others suspect them of unworthiness for their inability to find a fitting doom. Lord Wrek often leads Doomseeker warbands at his master's command.

There are eight Hordemasters in total, each commanding eight times eight warriors, paying homage to the holy number of the Lord of Skulls. Each Hordemaster is entrusted with the Doomhunter's commands and seeks out a mighty doom for himself and his warriors. Those who return with evidence of their brethren having died at the hands of a worthy foe have their skulls bronzed and placed in the Blood Chapel aboard the Horde's battlebarge, the Axe of God.

The Horde is constantly bolstered by new recruits; as the Doomseekers crusade across the Imperium in pursuit of their deaths, any mortals who survive their assaults are captured as slaves and serfs to serve as cannon fodder or sacrifices to their beast-ship and Khorne. As well as these mortals, it is not unusual for the Horde to attract members of other Chaos warbands to their banner in the name of slaughter. Squads of blood-crazed Khornate berzerkers sweep in and out of the Horde in search of battle, often reaping a vicious toll among the Doomseekers' own numbers in the process. Even loyalist Space Marines have been known to drop their false beliefs in the face of the Doomseekers' furious worship, and many have joined the Horde in recent decades; with them they bring fresh blood, weapons and armaments to be taken as the Horde's due when they fall in the service of their new, true patron deity.

Beliefs


"'Tis the finest death I have seen this morrow, for in truth, 'tis the only one!" - Hordemaster Rahab, discussing his murder of Redfang Planir, Champion of Khorne.



T
he Doomseekers worship Khorne as only warriors with the incredible skill of the Astartes can. The Horde crusades through Imperial space, striking increasingly dangerous targets in search of a death mighty enough to appease their patron deity. Each of the warriors of the Horde is driven by this hunt and they strive to become favoured in the eyes of Khorne by facing only the most lethal of opponents.

In the words of 3rd Hordemaster Turel,

"Ascension lies in glory, and the quickest route to glory is death. We will fight and die for the Blood God, we will kill and kill and kill until our armour is drenched in the blood of His enemies. We will hurl ourselves into the breach until we stand atop a pile of slaughtered foes or as part of it, and perhaps, just perhaps, we will receive His favour."


The Doomseekers are encouraged in this pursuit by their leader, the Daemon Prince Kalybos, and his loyal lieutenants, the Hordemasters. Inspired by their horrifying Prince, the Doomseekers pay homage to Khorne by emulating Kalybos' desire for a death at the hands of only the worthiest foes. They praise Khorne with every swing of their blades, and indulge in their most sacred prayer to the Blood God by reciting the Rites Vitae as they enter the killing field. The Rites are one of numerous scriptures recorded in the Horde's most treasured possessions, the Eight Books of Blood, tomes crafted from the desecrated skin of Imperial priests. Supposedly the Books were written by Kalybos himself shortly after his ascension, which goes some way to explaining the dark nature of the texts, which drain the blood of the reader as the pages are turned.

For all their dedication to slaughter, the Doomseekers are still religious zealots at heart and spend a great deal of their time in prayer to Khorne. These prayers are most often led by Lord Derj Moloq, the Horde's most fiery orator and the Master of the Rites Vitae. Before the Doomseekers' rededication to the Blood God, Moloq was a Word Bearer tipped for greatness, possibly even initiation as a Dark Apostle himself. Ritual scarification and bloodletting are commonplace during the worship of Khorne and great services are conducted within the Axe of God's Blood Chapel, a massive, crenellated affair adorned with the flensed corpses of the Horde's enemies and tended by the Apostles of The Blood, warriors whose connection to Khorne and his red, rage-soaked realm allow them to wield tremendous power on the battlefield, calling flaming axes from the sky to tear and rend the Blood God's enemies, or performing battle sacrifices to summon deadly bloodletter Daemons. Readings from the Eight Books of Blood take place within the Blood Chapel, when slaves are nailed to the ceiling and bled through a series of tributaries that rain onto the congregation in a holy, cleansing rain. The bronzed skulls of warriors who have died a particularly notable death are mounted on the walls of the Chapel, inscripted with the fallen Doomseeker's name and blessed by the Apostles of The Blood.

Gene-Seed


T
he majority of the Doomseekers' command echelon, including Kalybos the Doomhunter, were originally part of the Word Bearers Legion and thus bear the gene-seed of the Daemon Primarch Lorgar, though the touch of the Warp has irrevocably tainted their progenoid glands.

To date, the Horde has a variety of gene-seed in its ranks thanks to the Chaos warriors who are drawn to the charismatic power of the Doomhunter and the crimson path of Khorne, not to mention the presence of renegade Astartes from Chapters still loyal to the weakling Imperium.

Battlecry


L
ike all of Khorne's true followers, the Doomseekers use a battlecry older than the Imperium itself, a cry proven across countless battlefields and soaked with an ageless devotion to the Lord of Skulls, a cry which has seen the greatest of warriors quail in fear as His worshippers approach with the baleful light of murder in their eyes. All mortal beings know the rage of Khorne when they hear this cry, for it has been the death knell of a billion souls...

"Blood for the Blood God! Skulls for the Skull Throne!"


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BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!!!!!!

 

I like it. I like the characters you have going. The main critique I have is that right now they don't seem that much different than any other Bezerker warband. I think you need to capitalize on the fact that they are former Word Bearers (which I think is AWESOME, by the way). I think this is the nugget that you need to mine. This has very high potential.

 

SKULLS FOR THE SKULL THRONE!!!!

 

(shameless plug for you to check out my Liber WIP The Crimson Warlords)

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It is well written but they are just like regular khorne marines, I would like for you to make them different. I know you want to make them acceptable but dont be afraid to try new things, I like how they are searching for a suitable death.
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***UPDATED***

 

Now with an Origin, extended sections and most importantly, MORE BLOOD AND SKULLS!

 

Ahem. I'd also like to add that I made a recent purchase of the Chaos Lord in terminator armour and plan to paint him up as Hordemaster Wrek once my loyalists are painted.

 

Let us know if you've any advice on the IT!

 

Od.

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Thoughts as I read:

 

- Black Crusades don't fail. Constant pressure over time. The Corpse God will be held by The Despoiler's claw eventually.

- "bypassing the Cadian gate and Abaddon's continuous failures." you mentioned this sentence twice in a row.

- I think you can condense the history. It is a decent story, but it drags on a bit. I think you can get the gist that a dying Khorne Warlord passes on the info, and your guy turns.

- I like the "Chapter Organization" and "Beliefs" sections a lot. I like the preachers of Khorne thing you got going on.

 

I definitely have to say that the History section is your weakest. It feels... forced, if that makes sense. I think you need to focus on the interaction of the Khorne Warlord, Kalybos, and the battle with Slaanesh. I would leave out Nurgle and Tzeentch. Kalybos could have come to the planet to court both of them. I just see a planet with all 4 Ruinous Powers' representatives on it a bit much.

 

I hope this helps! My warband would proudly fight with you by heaping the skulls of the Imperium upon the Blood Lord's throne!

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Thoughts as I read...

 

Thanks buddy! All criticism is welcome and encouraged. How am I supposed to improve otherwise?

 

SO, in response, I've deleted that duplicate sentence, which I really should have spotted in the first place, and edited the part mentioning Abaddon so it becomes obvious that it's an opinion rather than a statement of incorrect facts.

 

While I have trimmed the story down, I've really only gotten shot of Nurgle and Tzeentch and added a bit of padding to the poor sap sent out to see the Slaanesh-worshippers.

 

I'm trying to write a cut-down version of the battle and Kalybos' turning, but damn my vanity I just like that scene too much. I'll see if I get any more opinions before I cut that down completely.

 

Thanks again! :unsure:

 

Od.

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This has definate potential. I like it.

 

One thing that stood out at me was this:

 

the fate of Kalybos' final emissary was revealed; chained to the front of Lustingclaw's vehicle, screaming in agonistic ecstasy, his ribcage cracked and split wide like some gory tome, was Salacious Hark

 

You could probably end this after "tome". We already know who the emmisary is, so telling us his name one last time is sort of isn't needed.

 

As a side note, I almost read "agonistic" as "agnostic" :D .

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*** UPDATED ** Now with fluffy sidebars AND shiny dropcaps and skullheaders! A colourscheme is currently in the works, but this, understandably, may take some time as the Chaos Painter doesn't receive as much love as the Astartes Painter. =D

 

Thanks for looking!

 

Od.

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