You know you're an Imperial Guardsman when...

[librisrouge]

...when you're explaining to a friend your flyer based list and they comment about how easily they'll remove all your models from the table on turn one. The look on their face when you tell them how many that is is priceless.

 

...when you listen to the latest ICs podcast (Show of Force: Hammer of the Emperor) and you actively fist bump every time they mention something cool about the Imperial Guard (and boo every time they call it the Astra Militarum.)

 

...when you start playing 30k and immediately jump into the Solar Auxilia because you don't play mutants, sanctioned or otherwise.

[WarriorFish]

you actively fist bump every time they mention something cool about the Imperial Guard (and boo every time they call it the Astra Militarum.)

So, every time they mention something Guard then?

 

You know you're Guard when crushing those who underestimate your troops is half then fun of playing... the other half is playing Guard

[Wassa]

... when your gaming pals want a 3vs3 500pt battle and suggest... "everyone gets 5 CP because noone will be able to make a detachment" and you turn into a Lord Commissar demanding they stick to the CP rules while hoarding 2 batallions worth of CP.

[TheUbikator]

... when a marine player laughs that your infantry squad is useless and then that squad forces him to make 8 armour saves on his precious snowflake squad. 

 

... when someone blows up your chimera, but you don't care. You have 5 more.

 

... when someone forgets to screen his valuable tanks and you placed entire tempestus scions battalion in single valkyrie squadron.

[Bjorn Firewalker]

When you accept this Black Knight as a patron saint, on your Commissar's "advise."

 

Commissar with four augmetic limbs: "As guardsmen, our duty is not to fight for the God-Emperor, but to die for Him. In the time that it takes us to die, other armies and warlords can come and take our place."

[Mikhail the Valhallan]

When you make regular use of your heavy weapons teams to hose down your (valhallan) leman Russ tanks. I love "fire in my command!"

[Inso]

... when your "they're just guard" army fires it's flashlights... and there aren't enough dice at the venue.

 

... when your opponent suddenly realises that lasguns, when fired en-mass by the multitudes of the Imperial Guard, work like water erosion... and what can't be eroded by lasguns will be washed away by the armour of the tank companies.

 

... when your army of men/women have waged war in an alien universe and have been victorious... and they are just humans... doing a job.

[Mileposter]

... When the opponent insists on a bathroom break before your turn begins.

 

... When you correct opponents on claiming you're playing an "Imperium" army.

 

... When you find yourself scoffing anytime someone uses the term "overkill".

[Bjorn Firewalker]

... When you find yourself scoffing anytime someone uses the term "overkill".

Every competent warlord should do this in-game. What do they think we're playing, anyway? 'Hello Kitty's Babysitting Adventures'?

[librisrouge]

...when you run knights for a six battle tournament (BAO) and you spend much of the four hour drive home list hammering a three super-heavy tank list for your IG (because they've got bigger guns.)

[Kinstryfe]

...when you've killed so much of the enemy army that you get to play sniper with your artillery.

[Stofficus]

... when you suggest to your platoon in real life that fixing bayonets is a valid anti armour strategy.

 

I got a lot of chuckles from that one until they realized I was only half joking.

[Shamansky]

... you take expensive units because your car's cargo hold is not big enough for your army

[librisrouge]

... you take expensive units because your car's cargo hold is not big enough for your army

...you take expensive units because moving that much infantry risks crippling carpel tunnel.

[Bjorn Firewalker]

 

... you take expensive units because your car's cargo hold is not big enough for your army

...you take expensive units because moving that much infantry risks crippling carpel tunnel.

You drive your car onto the gaming arena, and attempt to pass it off as a Capitol Imperialis, so you won't have to move all those models far from your vehicle.

[noigrim]

Someone brings psykers and you think: heresy

[MrZakalwe]

You praise Creed that the two soldiers you saved from battleshock with the D3 strat make their charge from outside of LoS to lock a las-pred in close combat saving the damaged Hellhound you're relying on from a messy lascannon enabled death.

 

Just as planned, baby.