The Ravens Revenant

[Loddfafnir113]

I present for your scrutiny my first DIY chapter. Initially the idea started out as tribal Raven Guard, and has evolved a fair bit since then. I feel they are now mostly fleshed out, but before I go further I would appreciate a bit of feedback on what I have so far. This is still in quite a raw form (particularly the origins section), so all any and all sections are subject to rewrites.

The Ravens Revenant

Founding Chapter: Raptors

Founded: M37

Chapter Master: Yrik Vulsung

Homeworld: Runharl

Fortress Monastery: Cerrig Tarn

Colours: Brown, grey and bone

Origins

Founding

Of Raven Guard descent, the history of the Ravens Revenant begins in M37. The Raptors chapter were one of the many selected to have their gene seed used in this founding and it was Cadran, a veteran sergeant of the first company, who was honoured with the task of building the new chapter and becoming its first master. Upon arriving at the new chapters designated homeworld, the feral world of Runharl in the Ultima segmentum, Cadran found a much greater number of imperial and mechanicus vessels in orbit than he thought necessary to build the chapter infrastructure. Upon establishing communications with the fleet, it turned out that Runharl had been approved for colonization and mining, and the fleet was here to begin the construction of hives and mining facilities. Both parties protested to the others presence, transmitting their appropriate documentation entitling them to the planet and discounting the other as the the unfortunate recipient of an administrative error. Tensions began to mount as neither side was willing to revoke its claim, and diplomacy soon began to descend to threatening, though neither side was willing to fire first. Though the colonization fleet was much larger, Cadran's force was built for war, and neither side truly liked their chances if events turned to battle. Had he been of the proud line of Dorn or the Lion things may have gone very differently, but Cadran was of the line of Corax, and he refused to let stubbornness or rash action endanger his new chapter before it had even begun. Eventually, he managed to work out an accord between the two groups. Cadran would construct the chapters fortress monastery on an island in the northern hemisphere, and recruit from the tribal societies north of the volcanic equatorial region, while the colonization fleet would be allowed to construct one hive city on the southern pole and a small number of mining facilities and refineries in the southern hemisphere. This allowed the imperial operations a great degree of protection while still being independent of the chapter, and in return the chapter would gain a small tithe of raw materials and be able to take recruits from any hive gangs (which Cadran knew would inevitably develop). Though the colonization fleet was not completely happy with the outcome, it did allow them to avoid years, perhaps even decades of waiting while the Administratum came to a formal decision on the matter, and so an agreement was reached, the planet was divided, and construction could begin.

Crafting the Chapter

Cadran used the years it took to bring the chapter to battle ready strength wisely. He was of the Raptors, his way was of patience and planning, of careful observation and turning the environment to his advantage, and this challenge was no different. He observed how the tribes hunted the great bear like creatures in the northern mountains, how they stalked and planned their attacks before erupting from their hiding spots and bearing down ferociously on the creatures, giving them no time to react and no escape from the onslaught. He learned of their faith of many gods, and sent agents to carefully integrate themselves into the tribes and introduce more elements of the Imperium to their religion: a god of gods who sits on a golden seat in the highest heaven, and his son the Raven who is the greatest and most patient of hunters. The fruits of this labour were visible fairly soon, as the more recognisable symbols made the later stages of recruits much easier to indoctrinate into the chapter cult.

Homeworld and Beliefs

Combat Doctrine

As is to be expected from a Raven Guard successor, the chapter will scout out enemy positions extensivley to find the best place to strike from. However, rather than the hit-and-run tactics of their parent chapter, the Ravens Revenant will erupt from the shadows as one in a storm of bolter fire, pressing their advantage and using sheer force to overwhelm an enemy and crush them in one swift blow. Massed drop pod deployments are also favoured. A battlegroup from the chapter will often consist of two or more companies, with overall command usually decided by the divinations of an accompanying librarian. The chapter has gained a reputation for being headstrong and stubborn in combined actions. Though they are not adverse to taking orders, if they feel strongly that a different course of action is more appropraite or another target more important, they will break away from their allies and act alone, a trait which has incurred the ire of more than one imperial commander.

[ElectricPaladin]

This seems like a really great start. I like how you have avoided the "excesses" that seem common in chapters, like deep pockets or connections to the Mechanicum or a specialty that can be summed up as "being the best at everything" or lengthy histories of gloriously beating the tar out of everyone and everything. I like the Wolf Heads as well - they're a nice touch. Very mysterious, but I can see where the custom would come in handy.

[Sete]

Good I like it. Very well written. It was a pleasant read.

Curious about the Vargdyn!

[Jape]

The Vargdyn are a very cool touch. I get the sense of a close knit chapter without relying on a generic 'brothers in arms' vibe, they have a distinct culture that sets them apart - for good or ill - and the Resurrection and use of divination give them a mystic quality. Its all very tasty, I'd love to read more and in particular on their distant dealings with other Imperial organisations? Have they had any close calls with the Ecclesiarchy? Is a particular Inquisitor gunning for them?

[Loddfafnir113]

Thanks for the comments guys, I'm glad the Vargdyn came across well. It was hard to convey them as this entity that's so important to the chapter without them taking center stage and overshadowing the rest, but I think I've struck a good balance with them.

 

Jape, thats pretty much my plan for their next stage of development. I can imagine the Ecclesiarchy not really knowing what to do with them. On the one hand the reverance for librarians and strange forms of divination are probably heavily frowned upon, but I reckon the fact that they believe the Emperor really is a god would allow them a bit of leniancy, at least enough to keep them from being burned at the nearest stake. Their interactions with other marine chapters is something I'm really looking forward to exploring though. In particular I've got an idea for a hard-line codex compliant chapter who take offence at the Ravens worshiping their Primarch (I'm thinking an Imperial Fists successor might be best for this) and end up with a huge grudge agaist them that gets steadily worse through a campaign. Hopefully I'll have something up about that by the end of the week.

[Welcheren]

Just an added area for your consideration: you could explore in more detail the sequence of events that led this chapter to its current combat doctrine; i.e. how it diverted from the ways of its parent chapter in order to arrive at its current MO.

 

In addition, I would be interested to see exactly how the home world culture of this chapter comes to displace its original views on the Emperor and the Primarchs as men, until the marines worship them. I assume that this would be a gradual process, and I am curious how the Chaplaincy comes to adopt and preach this doctrine.

Nice colour scheme by the way.

[Loddfafnir113]

Just an added area for your consideration: you could explore in more detail the sequence of events that led this chapter to its current combat doctrine; i.e. how it diverted from the ways of its parent chapter in order to arrive at its current MO.

 

 

In truth I gave this some consideration a while ago. I actually think that having them be founded from the Raptors instead of the Raven Guard directly makes more sense for the background I've actually written (now that I've got the latest codex and started planning an army I actually prefer Raptors chapter tactics too so double win).

 

In addition, I would be interested to see exactly how the home world culture of this chapter comes to displace its original views on the Emperor and the Primarchs as men, until the marines worship them. I assume that this would be a gradual process, and I am curious how the Chaplaincy comes to adopt and preach this doctrine.Nice colour scheme by the way.

Thanks for bringing this up. Now that I've read through it again that part definitely needs a bit more explanation. I tried to go for a 'less is more' approach with it but I think it was a bit too less. I'm going to try to make some updates to them over the next week or so.

[Welcheren]

 

Just an added area for your consideration: you could explore in more detail the sequence of events that led this chapter to its current combat doctrine; i.e. how it diverted from the ways of its parent chapter in order to arrive at its current MO.

 

 

In truth I gave this some consideration a while ago. I actually think that having them be founded from the Raptors instead of the Raven Guard directly makes more sense for the background I've actually written (now that I've got the latest codex and started planning an army I actually prefer Raptors chapter tactics too so double win).

 

In addition, I would be interested to see exactly how the home world culture of this chapter comes to displace its original views on the Emperor and the Primarchs as men, until the marines worship them. I assume that this would be a gradual process, and I am curious how the Chaplaincy comes to adopt and preach this doctrine.Nice colour scheme by the way.

Thanks for bringing this up. Now that I've read through it again that part definitely needs a bit more explanation. I tried to go for a 'less is more' approach with it but I think it was a bit too less. I'm going to try to make some updates to them over the next week or so.

 

 

I often go for a less is more style as well, because that one can wait for feedback on the Liber. 

 

I'll have to go and check up on the Raptors.

[Welcheren]

Yup. I agree that the Raptors will work very well.

[Dosjetka]

Quick question: why and, perhaps more importantly, how does the sudden destruction of the First Company cause the death of the rest of the Chapter?

While the loss of a hundred of the Chapter elite, along with most of their priceless wargear, is nothing to sniff at, I don't see how it could cause the destruction of the other 900+ brothers.

There could be a very good reason why, but you don't explain this event at all, hence the question :)

[Aqui]

Interesting

My main questions (asides from those already asked) would include:

Those chosen to join the Vargdyn - how is their disappearance from their previous position explained? Are they announced as KIA? Sent on a mission with the Deathwatch for example as a cover up for their real fate? A secret organisation within a Chapter which prides itself on being close knit could/would cause said questions to be asked. Also, from what I've read (and interpreted), they wear Terminator armour. Are those suits in addition to the typical one hundred that most Chapters have? If so, is there a reason that they would have that many?

A question on their insular nature. Has this caused any specific conflicts (as in, do you intend on possibly outlining one using other DIY Chapters, Guard regiments etc)? I just feel if one such event was outlined (even if only in brief), it would add more flavour

Other than that, I'll look forward to seeing more

[Loddfafnir113]

Quick question: why and, perhaps more importantly, how does the sudden destruction of the First Company cause the death of the rest of the Chapter?

While the loss of a hundred of the Chapter elite, along with most of their priceless wargear, is nothing to sniff at, I don't see how it could cause the destruction of the other 900+ brothers.

There could be a very good reason why, but you don't explain this event at all, hence the question

The loss of the first company is meant to be just one in a series of events which led to the near destruction of the chapter, though certainly the most sudden and drastic. I'll be expanding on this section soonish, got a bit of writers block with it so just waiting for inspiration to hit again.

Interesting

My main questions (asides from those already asked) would include:

Those chosen to join the Vargdyn - how is their disappearance from their previous position explained? Are they announced as KIA? Sent on a mission with the Deathwatch for example as a cover up for their real fate? A secret organisation within a Chapter which prides itself on being close knit could/would cause said questions to be asked. Also, from what I've read (and interpreted), they wear Terminator armour. Are those suits in addition to the typical one hundred that most Chapters have? If so, is there a reason that they would have that many?

A question on their insular nature. Has this caused any specific conflicts (as in, do you intend on possibly outlining one using other DIY Chapters, Guard regiments etc)? I just feel if one such event was outlined (even if only in brief), it would add more flavour

Other than that, I'll look forward to seeing more

After a bit more thought I'm now a bit undecided on the role the Vargdyn play within the chapter. I agree that having them being so secretive in a close knit chapter is a bit of a stretch. I still like the idea of them being a kind of seperate monastic order within the chapter, but I might make them an extension of the first company. This probably makes more sense with terminator armour being so rare that it becomes the ultimate reward and mark of honour for the brothers who wear it. I'll probably take the part about having more suits of TDA out, don't think it'll work in the grand scheme of things,

I do intend to write a rivalry between them and a more traditional codex adherant chapter and a few other imperial organisations, but I'll probably write those up in a timeline style format.

[Loddfafnir113]

I've begun making some quite significant changes to the chapter. Biggest thing is my decision to get rid of the Vargdyn. I couldn't really get a proper feel of where they fit into the chapter, and they were dangerously close to overshadowing everything else, so I decided to remove them. Also the idea that the chapter was nearly destroyed and rebuilt just wasn't working and throwing up more problems so that has also gone.

 

With these bits gone its made it much easier for me to envision the chapter properly, and i've got a much better sense of the direction I'm taking them. I've begun by re-writing the origins section and I'd love some feedback on how it is at the moment. What I really want to explore is the influences between a chapter and it's homeworld's population, as I see there being a great deal of adaptation on both sides. So rather than secret societies within the chapter and generic cataclysmic events, its going to be the subtle quirks of character and traditions which will hopefully make them unique. To help myself i've thrown together some general notes about the main points of the chapter into two categories, and it'll be the meshing of these two distinct lists which defines the Ravens Revenant.

Raven Guard successors: Concentrate on swift strikes against specific locations, stealth and infiltration skills, tactically flexible, reclusive.

Tribal Warrior society: Strong kinship bonds, pantheistic beliefs, respect/reverance for librarians and reliance on divination, preferance for strong shows of force.

[Welcheren]

I like it, especially the way in which local religion was moulded. 

 

One question: who are the agents that Cadran sent out to infiltrate the local tribes? I assume that space marines were involved in conducting observations of the tribes, but of course the infiltrators needed to look normal enough to be accepted.

 

I can see how the local warrior culture influenced combat doctrine. Do you have other/related influences in mind for the future?