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IA: Wings of Dawn - LASC 2019

Successor Chapter WIP LASC19

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#26
Ace Debonair

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Finally caught up with the updates, so far so good, I'd say!
The Wings of Dawn are certainly becoming quite an interesting group to read about! happy.png
 

To put it bluntly, the Imperium needed a chapter that would be quiet enough, secret enough, and somber enough, to build up on the planet and wait for their inevitable demise, with no hope of more. And, in that sense, the Dark Angel's Gene Seed proved the most adequate for such a grim and doomed chapter.


Throne of Terra, I love it. biggrin.png

What are the sons of the Lion if not patient? They'd wait ten thousand years for their prey to manifest itself.

 

Waiting for some mysterious dark omen to try its hand at slaying them wouldn't even make them blink.


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#27
Berzul

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To put it bluntly, the Imperium needed a chapter that would be quiet enough, secret enough, and somber enough, to build up on the planet and wait for their inevitable demise, with no hope of more. And, in that sense, the Dark Angel's Gene Seed proved the most adequate for such a grim and doomed chapter.


Well said.

 

 

Hahahaha! Thanks!

 

 

To put it bluntly, the Imperium needed a chapter that would be quiet enough, secret enough, and somber enough, to build up on the planet and wait for their inevitable demise, with no hope of more. And, in that sense, the Dark Angel's Gene Seed proved the most adequate for such a grim and doomed chapter.

 

Mmmkay, that's badcensored.gif .

 

 

Well, if one needed a group of astartes to sit down somewhere, and wait for the inevitable, who else WOULD one pick, if not the First Legion? sweat.gif

 

Finally caught up with the updates, so far so good, I'd say!
The Wings of Dawn are certainly becoming quite an interesting group to read about! happy.png
 

To put it bluntly, the Imperium needed a chapter that would be quiet enough, secret enough, and somber enough, to build up on the planet and wait for their inevitable demise, with no hope of more. And, in that sense, the Dark Angel's Gene Seed proved the most adequate for such a grim and doomed chapter.


Throne of Terra, I love it. biggrin.png

What are the sons of the Lion if not patient? They'd wait ten thousand years for their prey to manifest itself.

 

Waiting for some mysterious dark omen to try its hand at slaying them wouldn't even make them blink.

 

Thanks! It is really exciting that you all are taking the time to read this. I have been putting a lot of time on it, and it boosts the morale a lot to see people finding it a good read.

 

And yeah, the sons of the Lion are the patient hunters. And, this task, required then (and requires still) upmost patience and vigilance. So, it made sense to go with them.

 

+++++++++

 

Lets continue the story, then...

 

FOUNDING THE CHAPTER

By the year 581.M37, and half a century after the members of the Astra Telepathica managed to decide on a suitable course of action against the Great Omen, the chapter had been founded. One thousand warriors of Terran stock, bred in the vaults of Mars, and from the hallowed gene-seed of the First Legion. One more chapter, born into the tumult of the later 37th millennium, as part of the 23rd Founding.

 

The decision to create these warriors was taken quickly by the High Lords of Terra, as the word of the Emperor came often to them through those hard times with commands to bolster the defenses of the Imperium by the creation of new astartes. As if blessed by the very will of the Emperor, the process then of creating the zygotes needed to breed these warriors evolved with surprisingly few complications, and produced its results fairly quickly as well.

 

The only point of contention during the creation of the chapter was at the moment of deciding what gene-seed was to be used for the arduous task at hand. Stable genetic material was needed, as the events of the Cursed Founding were still ever present in the minds of all. A concern made all the more grievous by the purpose that this one chapter had as the cause for its creation, in the first place.

 

The gene-seed of the Thirteenth Legion was considered, due to its stability, and the impressive results of its use, as they could be tracked back through the history of the Imperium. The gene-seed of the Seventh Legion was considered as well, from a desire to see the world of Alcides and the Orientis Lux system both fortified to deadly perfection, as a way to ensure the defense of the galaxy against such dreaded and unknown threats as those seen in the Great Omen.

 

In the end, though, it was the gene-seed of the First Legion that was chosen. The High Lords of Terra, coming to see that the purpose for the creation of the chapter was not to be other than the fulfillment of the prophecy foretold by the members of the Astra Telepathica. No other genetic heritage available to them —they realized—, would be better suited to creating a chapter such as this. Fated to stoically await their own end at the edge of the galaxy, through the millennia, and safeguard mankind at the highest possible cost.

 

On the year 583.M37, the chapter was given its name. The Light Keepers. And, with weapons and armor befitting their task, taken from the vaults of Mars, they embarked on their ships and departed the home of mankind for the world of Alcides, to claim it as their own to defend.  

 

 

+++++++++++

 

The thing about the chapter I am making is that, the story, simple as it is, has been thought out as a way to give sense to the army I have.

 

When I first started to get interested in the hobby, everyone I knew and all marketing I saw, sold me the Ultramarines. Because, of course they all did. But, as I got into the lore, slowly and through bits and pieces, I was actually intrigued by the Imperial Fists. You know, fortification experts living on terra? What's not to love!

 

But, when the time came that I actually got INTO the game, the chapter I ended playing was the Dark Angels. Not by choice, but by luck, as my first models were from the dark vengeance box.

 

As I read more and more of their lore, I fell in love with them, and have played nothing but dark angels ever since. Always as a successor chapter, though, since to me the hobby is almost like a modelling version of a tabletop rpg. My army is my character in the game, and I like to make it my own. Which is hard with a pre-existing chapter from official sourcebooks and lore.

 

A lot of this chapter has been written to explain the way I play them, actually. Or to reflect the personal history I've had with the hobby.

 

On the tabletop, I like to play lots of infantry. Specially tactical squads, with little use of transports. And, I tend to play very tactical (always going for objectives, not for the kill at the cost of the objective), but at the same time always playing a bit recklessly. I like to overcharge plasma most of the time, move my army forward and just take the shots or the charges. I try to push myself to play my army without fear of getting blown off of the table, and when things go wrong, I tend to double down and just press my opponents even at the cost of exposing my army to the worst that they have to throw at me.

 

This all came into play when writing the chapter, as warriors that fight with infantry, fight tactically, and fight without fear of dying, so long as they can achieve their goals and with the fight.

 

As a side note, this is actually my second chapter. I used to play another successors, named the Angels of Deliverance, which were officially killed in the lore of my gaming group.


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"Fiat lux!"
- Battle cry of the Wings of Dawn, a Dark Angel's Successor Chapter

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#28
jbaeza94

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Jesus berzul, you're really cranking out that lore. It takes me days to get some sentences down, and then more to fix any mistakes / adress issues.

Keep it up!!
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"Honor the Legion" - Warcry and Motto of the Legion of the Iron Lions.
k0EYErV.pnggallery_26154_15777_7413.png


#29
Berzul

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Thanks, jbaeza94!

 

Im trying to get one more piece of lore a day, for as long as I can. A steady pace keeps the brain working, it seems. Some posts may come out less than inspired at times, but I'd rather get it DONE than to get it perfect. I can always take heed of any advice you all can give me, and go back to fix, correct and improve my writting.

 

... Also, I have comissioned an artist friend of mine to read the IA, and come up with some art to go along with it. Let's see if I can get some on hand before the deadline is up.


"Fiat lux!"
- Battle cry of the Wings of Dawn, a Dark Angel's Successor Chapter

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#30
jbaeza94

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If you're piece comes out good, I'll commission him too to create a piece for me. Razgriz and his legion guard standing inside a chapel or temple of some sort.

A piece a day is alot! Dont burn out! I like reading all of it 😊

"Honor the Legion" - Warcry and Motto of the Legion of the Iron Lions.
k0EYErV.pnggallery_26154_15777_7413.png


#31
Berzul

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Ill let you know.

To clear up, he is making pieces to go along the IA. Not EACH post... No way he can work at such a pace.

But Ill be sure to post his art, and if you like it, Im sure you can get some from him for the Legion! :D

Right now he is starting with a better image for the heraldric shield for the IA

"Fiat lux!"
- Battle cry of the Wings of Dawn, a Dark Angel's Successor Chapter

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#32
Berzul

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New day, new attempt at pushing on with the lore.

 

Let's keep going...

 

+++

 

THE SIGMALITE FORTRESS

In the year 585.M37, the cruisers and battle barges that carried the Light Keepers to the far side of the galaxy were first spotted entering the Orientis Lux system. Their arrival had been hailed by heralds of the Imperium for some years by then, as the coming of a great force with which humanity would do battle against the darkness that stretched beyond the great star that shone at the center of the system.

 

These warriors were then celebrated by the people of Alcides, albeit with cautious joy. Seen by most of the hivers as a blessing of fire and wrath, arriving to set up a bastion for the great Imperium, with which to protect them from the dangers of the beasts that roamed through the earth and the water all around them. Seen, at the same time, by planetary government, to be the embodiment of the end of times for their world. Knowing that they would have to subject themselves as vassals to the astartes, and relinquish unto them their homes, and their way of life. All for a purpose understood only by the High Lords of Terra and the astartes themselves.

 

And take control is exactly what they did.

 

Their ships descended on Alcides on a bright day, at the end of the year 585.M37, and from them came forth the thousand warriors that would turn this hive world of industry into a homeworld for the angels of the Emperor's wrath. Led by battle brother Elsheim Einheart, their first chapter master. Armed with both weapons and knowledge of the war to come, and ready to devote themselves to the task of securing Alcides for the good of the Imperium.

 

By Imperial decree, and the authority given to him by the will of the Emperor, Einheart stood before the planetary government, and claimed their fealty as vassals to his own will. The lives of their people would now serve the astartes, as loyal workers and hallowed recruits. Their homes would belong to the astartes, for them to protect and defend. Their enemies would be the astartes's enemies, to devastate without hesitation or mercy.

 

One by one, then, the companies of the chapter marched from the seat of government that resided at the heart of the city of Vaerlides, and into the Sigmal. Its halls, its defenses, and the might of its engines, were all claimed by the chapter as their own seat of power. Turned now, from a marvel of industry, into something greater. A fortress. The great fortress, which they named the Sigmalite, and from which they would then oversee their new homeworld, and prepare.

 

 

 

 

++++

 

 

As I continue to write, I come to realize that the titles I left for myself as a sort of guide for the content, do not really end up matching up correctly to the lore I end up writting for the most part, so I think I might go back and edit the titles to better reflect the text. Also, the posts I have made have the rough text of each part, but the main thread has some slight and minor edits for style applied to them, just, FYI.


Edited by Berzul, 04 October 2019 - 04:33 PM.

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"Fiat lux!"
- Battle cry of the Wings of Dawn, a Dark Angel's Successor Chapter

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#33
Berzul

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Well, in the end, I just changed the title to the last update, before I go into some details on tje fortress, and how it leads to the history of the chaptwr.

In the meantime, while I look for time write, i got this "preview" of some artworl a friwnd of mine is making for the Chapter

IMG-20191005-WA0011.jpg

I comissioned some pieces, but I have given him free reign to decide WHAT to draw.

Ill add this piece to the IA post, once its finished
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"Fiat lux!"
- Battle cry of the Wings of Dawn, a Dark Angel's Successor Chapter

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#34
Messor

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All your images appear to be broken sad.png


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The Liber; it's like a Biscopea for DIYs!

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#35
Berzul

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All your images appear to be broken sad.png

 

What?! Oh man, Ill look into it... Thanks for the heads up!

 

EDIT: I have reviewed the thread, and the images show up to me... I don't know what happened.


Edited by Berzul, 07 October 2019 - 08:32 PM.

"Fiat lux!"
- Battle cry of the Wings of Dawn, a Dark Angel's Successor Chapter

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#36
Ace Debonair

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Images are all showing up fine on my end. happy.png

 

That preview image is pretty darn spectacular, I have to say!



#37
Messor

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Aww, that means I'm the only missing out. Hopefully they'll show up on my home computer.


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The Liber; it's like a Biscopea for DIYs!

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#38
Berzul

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So, I've been working on re-structuring the IA of the chapter. Trying to fix some headers, put some info in a new more logical reading order. In doing so, I came to realize that, my current chapter structure does not take any primaris into account.

 

I originally started working on the chapter with no primaris in mind. I used to collect a different DA Successor chapter of my creation, which was very anti-primaris for lore reasons. A narrative campaign gave me the best opportunity to give that chapter a noble death and ending, so as to start working on the Wings of Dawn. Which, in essence, were made with a good degree of distance to the Hunt and the Fallen, so as to allow the chapter to operate without a forced connection to the secrets of the Dark Angels and the other successors. This, in part, so as to allow me to bring in as many primaris as I could want, without going crazy trying to make it work lore-wise.

 

But, again, as I wrote the chapter, I forgot all about the primaris. Since, I do not collect any at the moment. Only legacy marines.

 

While reworking a bit on the structure of the chapter, I came to realize, I may have made a mistake in not giving myself room for them. I had planned on beginning to collect primaris soon (once the possible Codex Update for the DA shows up), but I have no idea how to work them into the old codex-compliant structure of an astartes chapter.

 

So, I went and re-labeled my CHAPTER ORGANIZATION AND STRUCTURE part of the IA as the "ORIGINAL chapter organization and structure". And, I plan on expanding on how the Primaris fit into the current form of the chapter. But, as I know very little of Primaris and their place in the chapters, I wanted to ask:

 

Can anyone give me a hand with suggestions on how the primaris could fit here?


"Fiat lux!"
- Battle cry of the Wings of Dawn, a Dark Angel's Successor Chapter

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#39
Brother Lunkhead

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So, I went and re-labeled my CHAPTER ORGANIZATION AND STRUCTURE part of the IA as the "ORIGINAL chapter organization and structure". And, I plan on expanding on how the Primaris fit into the current form of the chapter. But, as I know very little of Primaris and their place in the chapters, I wanted to ask:

 

Can anyone give me a hand with suggestions on how the primaris could fit here?

 

When in doubt default to the Codex. Currently it is prescribed that Vanguard Squads (Infiltrator Sqds. and Eliminator Sqds.) make up the primary ten squads of the 10th Company (still called the Scout Company). Currently there is no longer a prescribed number of Scout Squads for neophytes so technically you can have as many or as few Scout Squads as you wish (I still have ten myselfmsn-wink.gif). For the rest you can elect for a full Primaris Company (although not listed in C:SM, an 11th (Primaris) Company can be added to existing chapters as indicated in Guy Haley's 'Dark Imperium') or as a replacement for a fallen Battle-line Company, oorrr… mix Primaris Sqds into your Battle-line companies for a mixed bag of First Generation/Primaris companies. You could also just integrate them into your reserve companies.

 

For me, I've opted for a mix for my Praetorian Sword chapter. I've one Primaris company to replace a fallen (fallen in battleyes.gif , NOT fallen to Chaosdown.gif) battle-line company, ten Vanguard Squads to add to my 10th Company, and appropriate Primaris squads integrated into the reserves. Chapter Master Bellerophon welcomes the Primaris but will not integrate them into established battle-line companies, and with very few exceptions will not allow non-Primaris marines to cross the Rubiconno.gif


Edited by Brother Lunkhead, 08 October 2019 - 07:22 PM.

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#40
Berzul

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I like the idea of replacing the fallen brothers with primaris marines as they fall (in battle).

 

In the lore of my chapter, I have two battle companies having disappeared into the black beyond the limits of the known galaxy. I think I could use this as excuse to reform the 4th and 5th companies of the chapter, in Primaris form. Taking their members from the 10th company, as they go from neophytes to battle brothers. I'd have scouts from the legacy squads in the 10th, as "veterans" from the company itself, and use the 10th to bring in new recruits for primaris marines.

 

So, over time, the 10th would become full of primaris recruits, as scouts go from being in the 10th to the reserve companies, and then the battle companies.

Then, primaris neophytes would go from the 10th, to reserve companies, to the battle companies, by taking uyp the spaces left over by legacy marines dying in battle.

 

And, the first companies to go through this process, would be the 4th and 5th, because they are MIA companies for the chapter, per the current lore.

 

How would that be?


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"Fiat lux!"
- Battle cry of the Wings of Dawn, a Dark Angel's Successor Chapter

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#41
Brother Lunkhead

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I like the idea of replacing the fallen brothers with primaris marines as they fall (in battle).

 

How would that be?

 

...............and that works tooyes.gif

 

.... so long as you have the logistics train to support it and tactical guidelines for your integrated companieshappy.png


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#42
Berzul

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Ok, time to try and continue with the lore.

+++

THE SIGMALITE FORTRESS, THE SIGNS OF DOOM, & THE COVENANT OF VAERLIDES

It took little time for the battle brothers of the chapter to begin their work towards making Alcides a true bastion for the defense of the Imperium.

By the power of their authority as angels of the Emperor's wrath, they assumed direct control over most defenses, resources, and points of industry across the entire Underground Network. Factory quotas of production were filled almost entirely with requisitions for weapons and armor, and the Fellhae Generatoriums began to be tapped and taxed heavily, so as to channel their energy into these endeavors.

The surface, the oceans, and the mantle of Alcides began to be adopted as hunting and training grounds. The beasts of this world proving deadly and formidable opponents to the warriors of the chapter. Enough so, as to lead the chapter into crafting training excercises and battle rites based around their existence.

From their new halls inside the Sigmal, Grand Master Einheart oversaw these operations directly. Rapidly transforming this frontier world into a fortified one, and the grand design of the Sigmal itself into a monastery worthy of the war to come. Its machinery and its purpose changing as much as the rest of Alcides, by the presence of the astartes.

What soon followed this powerful burst of rapid change, was chaos. And, by the end of the first decade since the arrival of the chapter, the first signs of the incoming doom began to show.

Bound by the law of the Imperium, as manifested through the word of the High Lords of Terra, the inhabitants of Alcides had no choice but to bend to the will of the astartes. Despite their work in boosting the planet's production and in giving its inhabitants a newfound sense of purpose within the known galaxy, and despite their hand in relenting the dangers posed by the dreaded beasts that constantly assaulted the generatoriums, the fact remained that the planetary government was resentful of the control exerted by these warriors from Holy Terra. With many more citizens adding their voices to this resentment as the years went by, and more of Alcides was claimed for the efforts of preparing for a war that no one knew was coming. One that no one knew they had to prepare for at all.


+++ Work in progress +++

Writing on my phone is way more tiring than I expected... I need a laptop to continue.

:sigh:


Edited by Berzul, 09 October 2019 - 02:13 PM.

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"Fiat lux!"
- Battle cry of the Wings of Dawn, a Dark Angel's Successor Chapter

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#43
Berzul

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+++

 

(...) With many more citizens adding their voices to this resentment as the years went by, and as more of Alcides was claimed for the efforts of preparing for a war that no one knew was coming. One that no one knew they had to prepare for at all. With tensions rising slowly and silently into a veritable fever pitch, a time soon came when those disgruntled inhabitants of Alcides finally would decide to act against the battle brothers of the Light Keepers chapter.

 

The spark of rebellion was ignited in the later part of the year 596.M37, and as the surviving records of the chapter would later tell, this was the inciting act that opened the way for the Doom of Alcides to come forth. An act of defiance fueled by its corrupting influence. Fringe groups turned into organized movements by the hidden support of the planetary government from the hive city of Vaerlides, began to sabotage the Fellhae Generatoriums in the farthest reaches of the planet. Targeting first the hive city of Orsides, and later the hive city of Leanansides, both by rerouting their energy distribution through improvised conduits to create strategically placed stockpiles of refined emulsion, and by halting production altogether in carefully selected factories throughout the cities inner sectors. The consequence of these actions being an artificially generated surge of bestial attacks along the northern and western regions of the Underground Network. Through careful and insidious coordination with co-conspirators inside the command structure of the planetary defense force, this all led to what would later be referred to as the False Migration; a period of over two years of attacks against undefended outposts that would force the Light Keepers on a stretched march across the planet. A task that would put their strength as a warring force to the test, as their own logistical and weapons manufacturing capabilities were hindered by the acts of the saboteurs.

 

The attacks across the planet and the need for new arms and munitions for the task of pacifying the bestial hordes that were at every gate and outpost in the northern and western hemispheres of Alcides, pushed Grand Master Einheart in the year 598.M37 to make the decision of commanding the greatest source of energy and industry still available to the chapter. The machinery that was at the heart of the Sigmalite Fortress. The only drills and refineries that could push through the upper mantle of the planet to reach its outer core, and tap into the large emulsion repositories that were known to reside there. These sources of energy gave the Light Keepers a way to bypass the organized and planet-wide acts of sabotage that the planetary government had enacted, and resume the manufacturing of weapons and munitions needed to win back the home-world from the beasts.

 

With this, and within a few months of arduous battle, the False Migration was ended, and the insidious acts of the planetary dissenters were laid bare. Still, it would take a whole other year for the chapter to put the planet back into a semblance of order, and even more time to bring its infrastructure back to the levels it once had. Both tasks achieved, not just through the use of force to crush the surviving saboteurs and to quell dissenting rhetoric in the hive cities, but also through the use of diplomacy to bring to heel the heads of every rebellious group that had once decided to pick up arms against the astartes.

 

Grand Master Einheart, suspecting the hand of inescapable fate at play in the speed and willingness of many inhabitants of Alcides to stand against the chosen sons of the Emperor of Mankind, came to the conclusion that purging this world of rebels and traitors —noble a task though it could be—, would eventually play into the grand designs of the incoming doom. Another approach, then, had to be taken. With that in mind, the Grand Master, along with a personal retinue composed of his chief librarian, his reclusiarch, and the first squad of the first company, marched upon the halls of the planetary government in the hive city of Vaerlides. After a week of discussions and negotiations, Einheart finally revealed to the planetary government some of the truth of the vision of the Doom of Alcides, witnessed by the Astra Telepathica so many decades ago; as well as his need for the planet to stand alongside the chapter to face the evil that was coming.

 

At the end of said conversations, an agreement was made between the Grand Master and the planetary government. A pact named by imperial records as the Covenant of Vaerlides, by which the inhabitants of Alcides swore their allegiance to the astartes. Their lives never again to be spent in confrontation to their actions, but rather laid willingly before the Light Keepers, in perpetual serfdom, so as to aid them in their preparations for the coming destruction that they would confront in the name of the whole of humanity.

 

+++

 

There. Another chapter of the lore, done. Only 21 days to go to finish the whole thing!


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"Fiat lux!"
- Battle cry of the Wings of Dawn, a Dark Angel's Successor Chapter

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#44
Brother Lunkhead

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Grand Master Einheart, suspecting the hand of inescapable fate at play in the speed and willingness of many inhabitants of Alcides to stand against the chosen sons of the Emperor of Mankind, came to the conclusion that purging this world of rebels and traitors —noble a task though it could be—, would eventually play into the grand designs of the incoming doom. Another approach, then, had to be taken. With that in mind, the Grand Master, along with a personal retinue composed of his chief librarian, his reclusiarch, and the first squad of the first company, marched upon the halls of the planetary government in the hive city of Vaerlides. After a week of discussions and negotiations, Einheart finally revealed to the planetary government some of the truth of the vision of the Doom of Alcides, witnessed by the Astra Telepathica so many decades ago; as well as his need for the planet to stand alongside the chapter to face the evil that was coming.

 

At the end of said conversations, an agreement was made between the Grand Master and the planetary government. A pact named by imperial records as the Covenant of Vaerlides, by which the inhabitants of Alcides swore their allegiance to the astartes. Their lives never again to be spent in confrontation to their actions, but rather laid willingly before the Light Keepers, in perpetual serfdom, so as to aid them in their preparations for the coming destruction that they would confront in the name of the whole of humanity.

 

 

Your overall lore is fleshing out very nicely. It shows lots of imagination and the details look good. I do have some trouble with the section I quoted above. Grand Master Einheart definitely shows nuance and flexibility in his thinking on dealing with the problem at hand. However, in spite of his concerns about "the hand of inescapable fate at play" I'm not so sure about his diplomatic dealings with the planetary government. This seems far too lenient. After all they fomented rebellion against the Astartes and through them against the Imperium itself. I get that a certain amount of finesse and diplomacy must be used to prevent the entire society descending into chaos, but this is too tolerant. Even those paragons of virtue, the Ultramarinesrolleyesclean.gif would have dealt more sternly with the leaders of the rebellion. I would suggest that after things calmed down and the situation was stabilized key leaders in the rebellion were quietly "disappeared" and tried and executed. Those who were spared were made to understand that the same fate awaited them if they did not fully cooperate with the Chapter. These leaders too would be allowed to quietly "retire" and be replaced by more loyal and cooperative citizens.


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#45
Berzul

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Mmm...

Yeah, you know? When you read it again, it does make it seem like Einheart was way too soft on the rebels here.

I was worried I had been portraying the chapter too harshly, so perhaps I went too far on the other extreme. The idea IS that the situation with the planet leading to the False Migration is an issue with no good guys; where the chapter aggressively takes over but for a good cause, so the people aggressively rebel for their own good cause. And both their actions push the chapter into a course that leads directly into the doom they are there to stop.

But, in trying to balance out the ruthlessness of the chapter, I clearly have gone too far.

Luckly, it seems more of a mistake of omition. Perhaps I could go back and detail how the rebellious forces were slaughtered, their leaders hanged and made example of, with both tje hive cities of Orsides and Leanansided being reclaimed by blood. Thus, scaring the planetary government in Vaerlides to want to try a truce. Einheart realizes diplomacy at this point is better than outright massacre, and agrees to the covenant.

Then, down the line, the government is brought fully into compliance, through actual diplomacy, or through whatever means are necessary...

How would that go?

"Fiat lux!"
- Battle cry of the Wings of Dawn, a Dark Angel's Successor Chapter

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#46
Berzul

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How's this?

With this, and within a few months of arduous battle, the False Migration was ended, and the insidious acts of the planetary dissenters were laid bare. Still, it would take a whole other year of conflict for the chapter to put the last of the known rebels to the sword, and even more time to guide the planet back into a semblance of order, and to bring its infrastructure back to the levels it once had. All tasks achieved, not just through the use of force to crush the surviving saboteurs and to quell dissenting rhetoric in the hive cities, but also through the use of diplomacy to bring to heel the citizens of each rebellious sector that had once harbored those who had decided to pick up arms against the astartes.

Grand Master Einheart, suspecting the hand of inescapable fate at play in the speed and willingness of many inhabitants of Alcides to stand against the chosen sons of the Emperor of Mankind, came to the conclusion that purging this world of rebels and traitors alone —noble a task though it could be—, would eventually just play into the grand designs of the incoming doom. Another approach, then, had to be taken. With that in mind, the Grand Master, along with a personal retinue composed of his chief librarian, his reclusiarch, and the first squad of the first company, marched upon the halls of the planetary government in Vaerlides; carrying with him the heads of the fallen leaders of the rebels from the other hive cities. Knowing they could not stand against these warriors, the old rulers of Alcides were forced to agree to a meeting. And, after a week of discussions and negotiations, Einheart finally revealed to the planetary government some of the truth of the vision of the Doom of Alcides, witnessed by the Astra Telepathica so many decades ago; as well as his need for the planet to stand alongside the chapter to face the evil that was coming.

At the end of said conversations, with the old rulers of Alcides understanding that there could be no oposing the astartes, and the Grand Master understanding that peace and unity before the doom to come was better than war and strife, an agreement was made between both sides. A pact named by imperial records as the Covenant of Vaerlides, by which the inhabitants of Alcides swore their allegiance to the astartes. Their lives never again to be spent in confrontation to their actions, but rather laid willingly before the Light Keepers, in perpetual serfdom, so as to aid them in their preparations for the coming destruction that they would confront in the name of the whole of humanity.

Edited by Berzul, 10 October 2019 - 02:46 PM.

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#47
Brother Lunkhead

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Yeah, I think that works much better. Your revision reads more true to Astartes form while leaving room for the nuance of diplomacy and mercy on Einheart's partyes.gif

 

I completely sympathize with you on wanting to create balance in your narrative (and I think this does it well). One of the things that fascinates me about the 40K-verse is the sheer brutality of it all, especially on the part of the "good guys."* It really takes me out of my comfort zone. Although, considering human history it probably shouldn'twacko.png  I find that in creating narratives in this world, what works best for me is to stay true to the characters (and this is where it's important to "know" your characters well) and just take their actions to their logical conclusions.

 

*Yeah, yeah, I know "good guys" is very loaded and subjective depending on where your loyalties lay (yup, I'm talkin' especially to you heretics and xeno lovers out theremsn-wink.gif).

For me the "good guys" side with the Imperiumbiggrin.png

 

BTW: That is some fantastic heraldry work your friend did for youthumbsup.gif


Edited by Brother Lunkhead, 10 October 2019 - 06:06 PM.

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#48
Berzul

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Thank you. Both for taking the time to read, and for your very good points.

I have no desire to portray the Wings of Dawn as noble "good guys". They are just as brutal and merciless as any chapter, which is a trait of the grim dark universe of Warhammer 40k that I love.

But, at the same time, there are degrees to all violence. And these guys are meant to be calmer, more pragmatic, and tactical. They are not as bloodthirsty as say, the Flesh Tearers. Or as violently fanatic as say, the Black Templars. Nor as predatory as say, the Carcharodons.

Still, I see that in my writting I ended up showing them too soft in this part. What I was trying to balance here was the brutality of both sides. Not their mercy.

I think that, yes. Now tje chapter is better represented. Just as brutal as any astartes, but more controlled and less bloodthirsty than some.

Einheart in particular is a character I envisioned from before this IA as a cool headed, tactical and even diplomatic Chapter Master. Like you said, capable of nuance, flexibility and even mercy at times. That was a great way of putting it. All of this, without going the way of the Salamanders in terms of their consideration of the value of human life.

This is still a First Legion successor chapter, after all!

Thnks, again, for your advice and comments.

Oh and,about rhe heraldry? Thats just the rough sketch! I look forward to him handing me the finiHed one! Ill let him know the appretiation it received here. Thank you.

"Fiat lux!"
- Battle cry of the Wings of Dawn, a Dark Angel's Successor Chapter

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#49
Berzul

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Not really a lore update, but I still thought I'd share it, here is an update on the piece my artist friend is making for me.

IMG-20191012-WA0000.jpg

Next up, color!
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#50
Brother Lunkhead

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Heraldry...…. YOWZAHthumbsup.gif


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