Messor

While the details behind Sidon's present condition aren't super important to the story of the Flaming Swords (and I don't think the absence of those details detracts from the story at all), they make for a pretty interesting story themselves, something that might someday be fun to delve into in a narrative campaign or something. I do think that the Inquisitorial elements involved are being rather narrow in their scope. It makes sense to investigate a Chapter with a suspicious background; we see that often. But the Flaming Swords are sitting on mysteries that could be every bit as impactful and every bit as heretical on their homeworld. While the Swords themselves may not take interest in delving deeper into those secrets, outside factions will (like the Mechanicum you mentioned). That's one thing I think would be worth giving mention in the Swords' story; the degree to which other parties have taken interest in Sidon's secrets since the Swords settled there.

That's metal as all get out, Nineswords. Looking forward to the new stuff!

Well, forgot a crucial step, but I painted them, so I figured I should post them: http://www.bolterandchainsword.com/topic/362736-it-the-pallid-procession-iron-gauntlet-2020/?p=5587573

I, Brother Messor, in service to the Pallid Procession and the Great Unclean One, vow before my brothers and sisters of the B&C to complete Challenge the Second and submit it to the Liber before the deadline. I vow to support my fellow challengers to the best of my ability. May the powers curse me if I fail.

Crush it, brother.

I'm with Ace on where some additional meat would be nice. I more wanted to say, though, that the presentation with your emblem and models is phenomenal! It's fun even just to look at the article, let alone reading it to learn about the Chapter.

Ah, I thought for sure Bellon and Lamonte was some sort of reverse portmanteau of Belmont.

Finally got around to reading this, and quite enjoyed it. I really like the theme and the Blood Angels are a great choice of the several First Founding Chapters that a theme like this would most logically come from. Am I correct in guessing at a Castlvania reference (I don't know much about the series other names) between the Wing Captains? I dig the execution of the flaws as they relate to the theme, but I would say that it feels too coincidental that a Chapter founded as "Gargoyles" would unexpectedly develop mutations that are so precisely on theme, unless the mutations were the result of an outside force. My suggestions in that case would be either to introduce such a force, perhaps a Chaos entity that employs a sorcerous attack on their gene-seed during an attack on their home system, OR for them to have been founded under another name, and adopt the Gargoyles moniker after the onset of their mutations. The issue I see with the first suggestion is that it really kind of undermines their position as part of the Cursed Founding. My only other feedback right now is just a matter of flow; I think it would benefit the Homeworld section to name the system early on. Right now it feels as though it's just suddenly there, rather than being introduced.

Here is the discussion thread for my entry: http://www.bolterandchainsword.com/topic/362736-index-traitoris-the-palid-procession-iron-gauntlet-2020/

I'm excited to see some Tau in the lineup!

I, Brother Messor, of indeterminate allegiance, take up your Challenges. I vow, before my brothers and sisters of the B&C to complete Challenge the First and submit it to the Liber before the deadline. I vow to support my fellow challengers to the best of my ability. May the powers curse me if I fail.

If you're looking to avoid the colors your son is using, but also don't want white, a simple compromise that will go with pretty much any color is gray. Metallic colors could also be really striking. I've never tried anything like this myself, but you might also be able to pull off using a couple of different shades of red. Looks like you're off to a solid start, though. Are there other aspects about the chapter's background you're looking to explore, or is it all still kind of under construction?

Another round of refinements, to give the Phantoms' struggle a bit more direction (hint, it's down), and to better establish the intentions of their "observer." Though I have a fairly clear plot in mind for where they go from here, I'm still mulling over how much is worth putting to page, and what form it should take.

Rekindling work on this project to hopefully circumvent the current writer's block, and because I always felt like these guys deserved to be more finished. So far I've only done some refining of existing material, begun work on an emblem, and added recruitment, but it already feels in a better place than it was before.

Good point. Let's have a Smaug equivalent as one of the Chapter's enemies. Does Asirnoth have a brother or sister? The Basilisks Chapter have been looking. They'll give a shout if they find anything.